feel so unbelievably gutted and sad :(

Hi guys.
I have recently come off my 40 mg citalropram over 3 months after being on it for 2 and a half years after feeling so much better. However I have really gone bad and back to my old ways and am going to go back to my doctor to go back on my meds as feel so shit. Just sucks as I was so confident that I was going to be fine and now i just bombed and cant go on feeling like this. I am just so gutted as wanted to come off as me and my partner were hoping to start a family I had been that much better and now its all just fallen apart.Just feel so lost and shit.

Hi,

This happened to me last year. I was on Fluoxetine for 4 years and came off them for almost 4 month before I started feeling I'll again. I was craving them by the end of September (came off June I believe).

Dont worry, I have managed to raise my daughter, I has depression from when she was about 6 months old. It's hard, but not unmanageable. Also, I know it doesnt really make a difference but I was only 18 when I had my daughter. Believe me, if I can do it - you can!

I have been on and off the Cit' since '04 and yes feeling rotten after you come off is common, sometimes this feeling will pass as the brain re-adjusts, other times you can go back to the old feelings. Did you taper off the 40mg, maybe you came off too abruptly?

In my experience anxiety wise I have always felt better after re-starting the Cit' and I have done this 4-5 times now.

Steve.

I was on meds 11yrs..been off them 2 yrs... It was hell when I came off, and it lasted months, i was tempted to go back on them... But I decided to fight through the hell, and I'm soooo much happier now than I ever was on meds...
There will come a time when you decide no more meds for good....

I'm sorry you're ill again without the meds. I hope the meds will kick in soon and get you back on track again.

i can fully appreciate why you would feel this way, worried. i had a similar experience many times with fluoxetine. i have been on and off it many times over the last few years. I suppose my using it has reflected how life has been going for me. the worse life has been, the more reliant on the meds i was. but in saying that, some of it is just a predisposition to depression for me. in any of us there are most likely undetected reasons for it - such as things going on in our body. for most people, fluctuations in levels of things like serotonin in our body make no difference. for others it makes a tremendous difference and this is when difficulties arise.
Last time I went back on it was Oct last year. I was feeling really bad and like you was very disappointed it had come to this.
However, as everyone told me back then, and as I will say to you now.... it is no reflection on you whatsoever that you need the meds again. its just the way it is. you havent failed at all.
in fact i respect you for recognising what is happening and taking action to do something about it. after all, if someone suffered from recurrent headaches, what would they do? Take painkillers and try to identify the cause of the headaches so they dont happen again. well no doubt you made similar realisations when you felt bad before and no doubt with the support of medication again you can do it and get to feel better too.
But one thing for sure dont beat yourself up over this. it really isnt worth it. i speak from my own experience and the support everyone has given me here. now it is about 6 months down the line and i do feel much better.
the meds helped me of course but also i have worked hard at getting stuck into life. dealing with what was wrong. it isnt easy as i am sure you know but it is possible.
All the best and look after yourself wont you?

hi bummer man delivers, i have come off fluoxtine before and it does take some time for your body to adjust, i recon about 4 month is the time i go before i go running to the gps surgery you may have to accept that you will need the meds to keep you level do not see it as a weakness its not blessings

Hey guys.
Thankyou for all the kind and helpful messages. I have been to the doctor and he agreed that I should go back onto 20 mg and see how i go from there.I feel up and down atm but have accepted that there is no shame in needing help.Have to say I really am grateful for this site as has made me realise that im not alone out there!Hope your all doing ok.xxx

Worried, i'm wondering how u r doing?

Tessar can you tell me how to post a thread on this site, i have stupidly forgotton!

and worried101 glad you are feeling better. xx