Death of a pet, finding it hard to cope

[louise123_uk]

My beloved pet cockatiel passed away last Wednesday at just over 18 and a half years of age and I have been devestated ever since.... I got her when I was about 8 so I cant remember alot of what life was even like without her. She was so loving and so much fun and I just cant get my head around that she'l never sit on my shoulder again or do cute little things. She was fit as a fiddle up until a year ago when she started having some breathing probs, but medicine from the vet helped alot, although she could never fly very far in the last year and in recent months banged into things a couple of times when flying, but she still had a great quality of life despite the flying probs and was very happy, active and loving and got alot out of life. Last week however she banged into a wall and when we picked her up she had a little bit of blood on her and then she just keeled over and died! We spent ages rubbing her thinking she would wake up but she never did..... We wrapped her in satin and placed her in a little box with letters and pics of us and buried her in the garden where she has a halogen light to mark out her grave

Its been a week and I am just so depressed, I know this may seem an overeaction tothe death of a pet but she really was a member of the family :-( Its just so scary how your life can be turned upside down in the blink of an eye :-( I have had the worst new year ever, am back at work today and just wish could go back to bed

I think one of the things that makes it even harder is apart from my parents who are also really upset (even my dad has been crying alot and he isnt the type of man who cries openly). My boyfriend is trying to be supportive but deep down im sure he thinks im pathetic

[Alabasterlyn]

I am sorry to hear about your little cockatiel, I don't think it's an overreaction at all. It's hard to lose a pet, be it a dog, cat or a bird. I used to have a cockatiel some years ago and we lost her when she flew out of an open door. I cried for days as I felt so guilty that I had left a door open and I knew she wouldn't be able to survive in the wild. I also keep chickens in the back garden and in the last year have lost 2 of them to illness. Both times it's been really awful and even my other half was upset too. It does get better with time, although I am sure right now you can't see beyond the grief that you feel

[pinkdove]

So sorry to hear about the loss of your pet.

And you are not overreacting at all, our pets become part of our life, and their love is unconditional, so it is natural you will grieve their loss.

I know this won't help but time will heal, but at the moment what you are feeling is so normal, i know how you feel, i never thought i would get over the loss of my pet, but you come to accept it, and start to remember all the happy, fun times you had together, and the good life you gave them. take care x

[PanchoGoz]

Hey,
I don't know if this helps (or if its a bit insensitive ) but when my pets died, I would go and get another one straight away. Thats the thing with animals, you love them to bits and are distraught when they die, but to bring new life back into your home is the best way of coping in my opinion. Fill that gap in your life straight away with a kitten or a guinie pig! Remember, for everything that dies, another is born from the ashes
Take care, I really hope you get through your grief swiftly x

[pinkdove]

Hey,
I don't know if this helps (or if its a bit insensitive ) but when my pets died, I would go and get another one straight away. Thats the thing with animals, you love them to bits and are distraught when they die, but to bring new life back into your home is the best way of coping in my opinion. Fill that gap in your life straight away with a kitten or a guinie pig! Remember, for everything that dies, another is born from the ashes
Take care, I really hope you get through your grief swiftly x

I think that is soo nice, it took me a wee while but i got another wee yorkie when mine died, thought i would never love another one the same, but she is my world , and you are right, to give a home to another loving animal is a great thing to do, and the love you get in return is so worth it.

i don't think it's insensitive, i think it mked perfect sense in time x

[D47C]

Personally I can't imagine life without my dog. When it dies or whatever it will be like losing an arm. The point is hoping you are coping.
You get used to things I guess I still miss my cat from 15 years ago though. Had 2 since I didn't particulary care for.
Anyhow life goes on and I hope you are surviving.

[haz]

I don't think you're overreacting either. Even my Psychiatrist said that the death of a pet is a big thing. I'm still not over losing my dog who sadly passed away just over two years ago, I had her for 9 years, she slept in my bed with me.

It's real bereavement and certainly nothing to be ashamed of.

So sorry for your loss.

Kind regards.

Haz.x

[theharvestmouse]

Sorry to hear about your cockateil, I know how it feels to lose a pet, and 18 1/2 years is a long time to have her. When I lost my dog it took months for it to really sink in and I was so upset. Last week one of my hens died and that also really upset me.

Hope the pain goes away soon, and you will always have the memories of her.

[louise123_uk]

Thanks for the words of support, it makes me a feel comforted a bit to know that other people feel the loss of an animal so profoundly as well. I have stopped crying all the time now, I only cry occassionally when i allow myself to think about her alot. It does make me ache to think Il never be able to stroke her or even see her again, I'd empty my bank account in a hearbeat for one more day but sadly death doesnt work like that and it makes me want to scream that its something I have little control of. I think I'l always miss her, but I do have comfort knowing she was loved and very very happy throughout her whole life.

[Stormsky]

My dog died neally 5yrs ago, he was my best friend, and have tears as i type now... i miss him still....
im really sorry for your loss, and i know how it feels.....