Death of a pet, finding it hard to cope

[MargaretHale]

There's no shame in feeling this way- pets are part of the family. Part of my recovery has been the dog that ypartner adopted. He's helped me massively with my agorahobia and because he's been so poorly treated, he's as nervous as I am around people. Sometimes when I'm alone and feeling really low, I'll have a good sob onto his neck and he never tells me to 'stop being silly' or 'calm down'.
I'm so sorry about your cockatiel, only you know what's best-to get another or to wait a while. Remember all the fun he gave you.

xx

[Rain]

Hi Louise,

I’m very sorry to hear of the loss of your pet, and of how it has impacted your family. We have frequently taken on older dogs from the rescue centre and so they were not with us for as long as we would have wished and that has been very sad. I also lost my dog that I had for 14 years in May 2010.

One way I found that was nice to remember him was to buy one of those large frames that hold half a dozen photos and fill it with our favourite photos of him. Every time I see this I am reminded that he had a happy life with us.

I think, when you are ready, a lovely tribute to him would be to open your home to another pet. There are so many pets in rescue centres desperately needing loving homes. The new pet will never replace the lost one in your heart, but I’m sure you have lots of love to give.

I read once of a man who ‘died’ on the operating table for a few minutes and then was resuscitated and came back to life. He said that when he was ‘on the other side’ all the dogs of his life ran to greet him. That is a lovely image that has stayed with me.

Giving a pet a loving home is so rewarding and will help you more than you realise.

[Stormsky]

One way I found that was nice to remember him was to buy one of those large frames that hold half a dozen photos and fill it with our favourite photos of him. Every time I see this I am reminded that he had a happy life with us.

I read once of a man who ‘died’ on the operating table for a few minutes and then was resuscitated and came back to life. He said that when he was ‘on the other side’ all the dogs of his life ran to greet him. .

I have a huge glass clip frame, with pics of my dog, along with a poem and a cutting of his hair...it hangs in my utility room, lovely reminder of his 10yrs with me...
re all the dogs coming to greet that man, this is Rainbow bridge, where pets wait for us.......

[cheryl foster]

i had a dobermann 5 years ago..he died at 11 months old from a blood disorder..i literally cried non stop for weeks..he was an amazing dog..on top of that i had to battle with the breeder and kennel club because the breeder turned out to breeding in the wrong way..i was mentally exhausted..people called me stupid..but my opinion is.. i have more respects for animals than alot people i know..people can be evil..what does a pet do so wrong? just wants love..so its not silly to be devastated when a pet dies.

[neroo]

I had a cane corso that i had to put down due to hip problems .. losing a pet is always hard
But having one for 18yrs and then losing them must be even more heart breaking

[cheryl foster]

boo! i answered on the other post

[niteshade]

I too am having a hard time with the loss of my cat. He has been my companion for 16 years. He got sick this past week and I took him to see his vet. They gave him antibiotics for a tooth infection and some ointment for an eye problem that seemed to come up over night. The vet checked him over and said he seemed ok other than those few things and that the antibiotics should help him alot. Well I took him home and he seemed to get a little better after a few days but on Friday he just stopped getting up and going to his food or his litter box unless I carried him to those things he just sat and stared at me. I decided to go and see the vet again on Friday and on the way just 2 blocks from home he went into a heart attack in my arms. It was so horrible not being able to do anything for him during those few minutes. I tried everything I knew and nothing helped him so I just hugged him close and at the last minute he calmed and looked up into my eyes and purred for a minute then drifted off and died in my arms.
I cant get those last minutes out of my mind. The suffering and then just drifting away from me. I cant quit crying and I dont want to go anywhere. I dont see how I am going to get over this it hurts me so badly. I feel like I missed some sign that he was trying to give me that he was sicker than I knew and that I should have taken him back sooner than I did.
I dont know how to get on with life right now everything is sad. He was my buddy. I talked to him about everything now he is gone and part of my heart with him. My family think that I am over reacting but I dont know how else to act and I try to put on a good face for them but its so hard. Am I crazy to hurt so much for him? I dont know. I just know I feel such an empty place in my heart right now. I feel panicked and anxious. Is this normal?

[redroseart]

I think that is soo nice, it took me a wee while but i got another wee yorkie when mine died, thought i would never love another one the same, but she is my world , and you are right, to give a home to another loving animal is a great thing to do, and the love you get in return is so worth it.

i don't think it's insensitive, i think it mked perfect sense in time x

hello my little dog died a month ago and cannot come to terms with my grief she meant everything to me she followed me everywhere and came to bed with me every night although i only had her for four months i knew her for 3 years. she belonged to my sons girlfriend and she came to live with me. i suffer with anxiety and depression and she made me better.

[Daisy Sue]

hi Louise, you're not over-reacting, and it's not pathetic. it's grief, and loss, and there's nothing abnormal about feeling that, whether it's a person or a pet...

my beautiful little cat got run over when i was a teenager, i loved that cat, she went everywhere with me... i grieved for 3 weeks solid, didn't stop crying, even lost my job at the time over it - and that was way before i ever had anxiety issues. so - it's normal.

just be proud that you gave your pet such a long and loving life within your family, and keep the nice memories at the forefront of your mind.

[ammiemum]

i hope this helps , it helped me ,when i was feeling so sad at the loss of shay a friends horse that i knew for 6months only but he was my only real connection with life at that time and he was all mine [as my friend said ,if she stood naked and covered in carrots, he would walk past her to get to me! so gentle and so very special..]i loved him .
Anyway, i was told all things that we all say to try to help and they are true -just not enough ...then was told that it isn't who or what the lost one is it is the space they have filled in our daily life that is so huge sometimes ..but this sort of freed me to mourn for him without feeling guilty ish -it was odd because i was soon able to rejoin the world a bit and it has only been through shay that i learned of unconditional love, respect and trust. He taught me to ride and i had not been in the slightest interested in horses before him....i still shed a tear for him but do not need to hide it and it is just becauuse i am grateful for what he gave me and i miss him but it is not crippling as it first was ..i too have pics etc the memories are good, funny etc now.