Are they really friends?

[eden.eden]

Ive been dealing with depressive episodes for several years quietly on my own but in Nov asked for help from GP as cant deal with it alone any more. Am on Mirtrazapine (but havent noticed any change) and just started counselling. Feeling dead inside. Dealing with long term issues as well as recent unemployment and financial issues. I live alone.

I am a very private person and on the persuasion of my GP opened up to 4 close friends about it although haven't told anyone else. 2 friends have been good, 2 have been conspicuous by their absence. One of the latter visited me today and told me I make it very difficult for my friends to help me and that I was really snappy with everyone "all my friends said so". I'm not aware of doing this but know my sarcastic sense of humour does get misunderstood sometimes - but if my friends who I have trusted so much to confide in are talking about me in this way what really is the point?

A few years ago I had cancer and was overwhelmed by friends helping and just being there for me. This feels so much worse and yet I feel so totally and utterly alone. If those I think of as 'close friends' feel this way about me I feel the only thing to do is to shut up shop and go.

[diane07]

Hi eden.eden

We just wanted to welcome you aboard to NMP. We hope you enjoy your stay here and get all the support and advice you need.

Please take some time to read the website articles on the left as well for loads of advice and tips.

[oneofus]

Ive been dealing with depressive episodes for several years quietly on my own but in Nov asked for help from GP as cant deal with it alone any more. Am on Mirtrazapine (but havent noticed any change) and just started counselling. Feeling dead inside. Dealing with long term issues as well as recent unemployment and financial issues. I live alone.

I am a very private person and on the persuasion of my GP opened up to 4 close friends about it although haven't told anyone else. 2 friends have been good, 2 have been conspicuous by their absence. One of the latter visited me today and told me I make it very difficult for my friends to help me and that I was really snappy with everyone "all my friends said so". I'm not aware of doing this but know my sarcastic sense of humour does get misunderstood sometimes - but if my friends who I have trusted so much to confide in are talking about me in this way what really is the point?

A few years ago I had cancer and was overwhelmed by friends helping and just being there for me. This feels so much worse and yet I feel so totally and utterly alone. If those I think of as 'close friends' feel this way about me I feel the only thing to do is to shut up shop and go.

Eden,

Sorry to hear about your situation, but you're doing the right thing seeing your GP. Mental health and friends don't always make good bedfellows but it sounds as if you have two good ones, and at least one who's prepared to call a spade a spade, which isn't easy in the best of situations.

Humour is all too easily misunderstood, I'm always falling for it as a quick fix; a quick joke about a situation makes me feel better esp. On the rare occasion my audience laughs but all too often it's only me who sees the joke. Mention it to your counsellor and she may be able to give you some help on watching your thoughts and catching them before you come out with a supposedly sarcastic quip.

Otherwise, keep up with medication and join in with the chatter here. You might realise there many here with similar problems, at least with telling decent jokes

One of us