Hi all, yet another "yaay I'm winning" post about anxiety, but this one is hopefully more realistic and it will demonstrate a definite improvement.
I started CBT about 4 months ago. At the time I was a nervous wreck, I don't even want to describe it to be honest. The therapy took time to track down my real problems but when we did the overwhelming anxiety backed down with surprising speed, and it rarely gets as bad these days.
Unfortunately the anxiety was replaced with feelings of sorrowwhich in turn gave way to feelings of deep, existential fear, which turned out to be the real problem. The fear seems to relate to my inability to reassure myself or cope with life's problems, which in turn lead to helpessness and more fear. Even this is now starting to break up a bit and I was able to recently go to Scotland for 4 days with my girlfriend.
Speaking of breaking up, I had horrible relationship anxiety for months and when we finally split up after we got back to England, I found myself not as devastated or depressed as I feared I might; if anything, my confidence has climbed to its highest ever. I've actually started noticing female attention from people I work with. I've been on evenings out, I've been out on my own a couple of times, I've patched things up with an old friend who's in the same boat as me and we have started our lives over again.
I've been using self-help mp3s which I made myself. I also constantly repeat positive, self-affirming statements to myself when things get bad. It has started working and I can feel a new confidence inside myself which has never been there before - like a light that's been brought into a hidden cave for the first time, showing me that things in there aren't as scary as I thought.
I hope this goes to prove that recovery - REAL recovery - can happen, although it takes a lot of time and requires almost more courage than you think you've got. Remember what Claire Weekes said: recovery lies in the people, places and experiences you fear.
Good luck!