checking on my boyfriend

[fretty freda]

hes an idiot i cant leave him hes just there for now

but makes me sick think of him with someone else , he cheated around a year ago , ever since i quiz question him daily his phone dies as he never charges his phone my anxiety goes crazy .....
ive done everything to try an catch him out and i cant stop trying to catch him im going loopy im like a bloody private detective now
i look into his emails , snoop everywere question him and try and catch him out stay up till 4am searching for answers its driving me crazy im obsessed he will cheat and i cant stop checking up , is there any way i can stop this , i cant talk to him and i cant leave him i just wanna stop checking as when i start i cant stop and its driving my anxiety wild

please help

[theharvestmouse]

Sorry but if you choose to stay with someone who has cheated on you then it will always be like that, even for someone without OCD.

[Beckybooboo]

Hi,

I agree with the above. Due to what you've gone through before you're always going to have that thought in the back of your mind, although, if you're able to be a strong enough person to let it go then that could all change..

Does he know how you feel about all of this? It's human nature for people to flirt and to make mistakes but it does depend on the extent of the infidelity with regards to if you can forgive him or not.

I do feel that you should speak to him and see what the best options will be, because one, if you don't you'll never know, and two, you'll keep driving yourself insane.

Good luck,
Becky

[fretty freda]

thanks girls i know its my own fault i stay with him just wondered how to stop quizzing him

[sadiesnow]

hi i had that problem with my ex i had to check his phone, i had to leave him in the end as i was suffering too much im so glad i did, i can totally relax now and feel so much better, i know its hard to stop, but it wil only get worse x

[Wanttofeelbetter]

Have to agree with the other posts however I do this and my partner has never cheated!! In fact he is lovely, I have been cheated on in the past though, by a guy I lived with so reckon its due to that.

I think I have managed to calm it down a bit but the thoughts are there everyday!!

I admitted I had hacked his fb, twitter and he was rediculously understanding so now have the guilt of that too!!

I honestly could not be with someone who cheated, i feel like i'm on course for a breakdown anyway!! Feel your pain but maybe some time on your own could be the answer.

It will all work out eventually (annoying saying but true!!)

Hx

[fretty freda]

its destroying me hes emotionally withdrawing and thats sending even more alarms off