Hello everyone

To start off i'm so glad theirs a website that offers help and support for people who suffer from panic attacks, anxiety and depression thanks to no more panic team for making this happen. I've had panic attacks here and there for about 10 years, i'm now 30. My first panic attack was a horrible experience!! its main fuel was guilt but subsided once everything was out in the open and didn't suffer from them until a few years later. It came out the blue. I was on reception at work just doing my day to day work then it hit me all of a sudden,this time there was no understanding why this happened it scared the living daylights out of me!!. I didn't have another one up until January of this year but this one had hit me hard i had three one after the other where before it was just one. Ever since i've just gone down hill . I made an appointment with my g.p and she referred me to C.B.T but i needed a little more help so about 2 weeks ago i went back and was put on citalapram (10mg). I've been on them twice before and they helped me to cope but after 3 days on them this time i was having panic attacks on panic attacks at one point i had an urge to go and stab myself then told myself that would bloody hurt cass!!! that feeling went away. I soon came of them, but ever since i have gone through every emotion going my main thought is a fear of dying where its come from i don't know!!!!! I think its because i'm a control freak and dying i can't control . I'm off work at the moment because i'm fearing everything going to sleep because my hearts getting ectopics and palpitations (been tested everything's fine, try telling my head that!!) waking up makes me feel surreal and light headed its getting to the point where i would long to be normal again to not feel on edge all the time to not be frightened of dying and to stop crying all the time plus the rest!!! . I'm glad its not just me but wouldn't want to wish this on anybody!!. Thanks for reading my thoughts guys please message back for your support xx