This is perhaps a bit of a strange one, as I've never known anyone else with a similar fear, I don't even know if it's a thing! But please do bear with me on this.

Does anyone else have a total fear of mess, and being messy? I don't mean house mess, like an untidy room (although that does make me feel uncomfortable!), I mean actually being messy, on your skin, or your clothes. I really can't deal with it, and it's getting worse and worse for me.

Today, I had a break from work, and went for a walk in the city centre. Somehow, I don't know what happened, but I ended up getting some sort of white mess on my black trousers and shoes, in big, white splotches. I don't know what it was, paint, bird mess, I don't really want to think about it. I didn't notice at the time, and didn't feel anything but when I got back to work and sat at my desk, I noticed it. I really panicked, and sweated, and felt faint and terrified at the sight of it all over my clothes, went to the bathroom to cry, and had to leave work early. Even though I was sitting at my desk, I couldn't concentrate on my work, knowing that my clothes were filthy. On the train home, I was mortified, feeling like everyone was looking at the mess all over me. I've come straight home and thrown my clothes straight in the washing machine, and I'm still shaking.

It's not something that's new to me--this will sound really weird, but one of my earliest memories as a child was getting really upset at those kids' TV shows they used to have, back in the 90s, where people would get thrown in a gunge tank, or covered in stuff, for getting questions wrong. Or whatever it was, I don't remember the actual rules, I just remember bursting into tears and running out of the room when I saw it happening to anyone. It seems so humiliating for someone to get their hair and clothes covered in such horrible stuff, and even now, seeing (or even thinking about) something like Wipeout, where people fall in that horrible sticky mud, makes me feel sick. I can't believe people find it funny.

So--does anyone else feel likewise, or even understand what I'm on about? Is there even a word for this, or is it just me being unhinged? If anyone else does feel the same, I'd love some advice. It's really affecting me.