Starting again

[theharvestmouse]

Been sat here for hours tonight, I've slipped into old ways these past few months. I know that I have to go through the fear barrier again or else this lonely existence will continue. I have to go out and do things, yes the thought terrifies me, I have looked at doing salsa dancing, which is about as far out of my comfort zone as I can imagine. But unless I face this then this continuous cycle will go on and I will never break free from it.

I suppose I am writing this for myself, basically to make sure that I read this and act upon it, tomorrow and onwards. If I don't try then its over for me, the last stop is approaching but there is a different track, either I take it or I carry on on this track and its heading towards a dead end.

[BobbyDog]

I am so sorry to hear that you feel like that theharvestmouse, you are normally so positive and helpful towards others.

It will be difficult to break free from old routines and habbits, you need to take a leaf out of your own book, follow the advice that you give to others.

I suffer from Social Anxiety, so I know how difficult these positive steps forwards will be for you.

Stay Strong; and keep us informed of your progress

[theharvestmouse]

I know BD, I often give advice out and don't follow it myself. I am really trying to do something this week as I don't want to get to the weekend having not done anything to try to socialise.

[BobbyDog]

I know BD, I often give advice out and don't follow it myself. I am really trying to do something this week as I don't want to get to the weekend having not done anything to try to socialise.

Write a list out for the week, take one small step each day. Go for a walk, got to the shop(take someone with you if possible), communicate with people you pass on the street, if only to say good morning, make a conversation with a neighbour, catch a bus.
I know all these things are difficult for SA sufferers, but it is worth a try theharvestmouse.

Rate each one for how anxious it made you feel 1-10 and keep repeating until your score drops, then you have cracked it!!!!

I do try to do these things regularly, I still find it difficult.........

Sarah.

[theharvestmouse]

Thanks BD, I am actually not too bad in some situations. But I do suffer from some social phobia, it can really depend on my GAD as well, that's what makes it all so complicated.

I am working full time, I function fairly well day to day when my mood is ok, I drive, do what's needed to be done. I have got better in shops, etc, and I find having conversations quite easy. But again I must say this is all on an OK-Good day. Of course I have had days where I just feel like hiding away from the world, but I know that to do that will cause more misery.

I have taken the first steps, but I suppose I have just stayed half way and not kept going. Hence my posting about doing more things to socially interact, in particular with women around my age.

Writing a list is a good idea, that reminds me of my CBT, and I should keep doing that. I am building up courage to go to a salsa dancing lesson tomorrow evening. Today I feel confident enough to be able to go, I know I will be nervous before hand but I really want to go as it would be a confidence boost. I read something last night about social phobia, it said we should face our fears and put ourselves out of our comfort zone. So maybe the first time I go I will feel nervous and shy, but if I keep going then it will become less of a fear.

I wonder how many people on here have broken free of social anxiety and are now living much happier lives.