what do you think?

[**whenwillthisend**]

Hi i would just like to question something my partner says to me...
when im at my worst and my partner says to me you will be fine, i always reply with..".but you dont know how i feel and if you havent experienced my symptoms then you cant possibly tell me im going to be fine ..cos you just dont know how bad i feel"...

I will then sometimes say just you hope you never get it cos there is no way you would be able to handle it!

He then replies "well i will never get anxiety and panic attacks as im too strong and i would not let it get a hold of me, you are being weak and need to tell yourself there is nothing wrong with you"

Dont get me wrong he does look after me and supports me and helps with the kids, but i just feel like he doesnt have a clue about what im going through, i think he thinks our physical symptoms are imagined
my question is..is he right to say we are weak thats why anxiety has a hold?
In a way i wonder has why do some people get panic attacks while others dont... are we just sensitive people?

I must say i admire his outlook on life and wish i could be more positive, he is happy whereas i curl up on the settee and wonder how long ive got before i pop my clogs..

I wish i could change ..but i cant

[blackie]

Hiya
I dont think that is fare to say that only weak people get panic attacks. People who have jumped out of airoplanes get panic attacks. I dont know why some people get panic attacks and others dont. Perhaps it has something to do with genes or brain chemisty, perhaps its from exsperiences i dont know.
The physical symptons are very real though. Some happen as a chain of events such as not breathing properly can lead to a build up of carbon dioxide. This makes the body more alkaline which makes the nerves go all frantic.
It must be very hard to imagine what a p[anic attack is like if you have never had one. But if you do have them then you are definatly not weak.
One quote i heard recently was "for a person to be brave, they have to be scared"
Blackie

[mia0621]

I don't think anyone has the right to call us weak. for the most part,we are strong compassionate intelligent people who have high expectations. We think seriously and analyze things a lot. My husband has the same outlook on life, but in talking to him, I know he doesn't really give most things a lot of thought. He takes things at face value. We look at thiings from every concievable angle. Sometimes things get so confusing for us because there seem to be so many possible answers to most questions. I know if I had my way, everything would always run like clockwork. I would be such a neat freak,and everything would be organized perfectly. It is when things deviate from that ideal, that I start getting tense. It is tough to get someone to conform to your ideals, because we all look at things differently.

[hayles]

I hear ya!

My Husband is exactly the same. I love him to bits and without him....God Knows, but he is so care free.
I get emotional about the smallest things, I cired last night coz i was just so exhaused with anxiety...his attitude was so similar to your partner....You will be fine, Need to snap out of it, not be so negative.......

Is it that we are so negative, always thinking the worst, not being able to believ that we can truely be happy without something bad happening!!!!

Is this the problem....not believeing deep down that we deserve happiness that something must go wrong???

Hay x