Pregnancy and ectopic fear

[spacebunnyx]

Hiya,

Just after some support/advice really. Had lots of infertility issues in the past and IVF (which didn't work out ) and have now found out I'm pregnant - about 5 weeks!!

I should be excited but Im so so scared. I've had an ectopic pregnancy in the past which ruptured and made me very poorly and now Im scared its going to happen again I need to wait for a scan at 6 weeks but what if its ectopic and it ruptures before then?

I'm having twangs and twitches on the good side of my pelvic area (the other side i don't have a tube).

I know that my anxiety and fear about this is REAL, I just can't handle the uncertainty very well and get myself in a state!

xxx

[ElizabethJane]

Dear Spacebunny sending many cyberhugs. I agree that your anxiety about the pregnancy is real and congratulations on becoming pregnant. I had successful IVF first attempt and had had eight and a half years of infertility. If you can practice some relaxation techniques the time to start doing them is now. If you can download something that will help such as visualisation techniques such as a healthy womb and a successful pregnancy emplanting itself in your womb. Try to rest as much as possible and I hope that you will come back with good news at six weeks pregnant. EJ

[justina]

I have had am ectopic as well and after that I had to do scans at 6 weeks, too. I don't think you need to worry at all because before 6 weeks it is so small, there can't be any rupture, most ruptures happen around 8 weeks or later

[lo89]

Hey, this is something I can sort of relate to. I had a miscarriage in 2010, and it took me weeks to get over the physical pain and about a year to deal with the emotional pain.
I fell pregnant again in June this year and was petrified from the moment I first began to suspect I was pregnant (I had a 'feeling' I was pregnant, so did a test to prove to myself that I wasn't as I was on the pill, sure enough I was) although we were both delighted and excited, the timing wasn't great as I am in my final few weeks of teacher training, we do not live together yet, and basically it just was a big shock!
Once the initial shock wore off I was petrified, every twinge and ache I had, I was sent into fits of panic.
I went to A&E on one occasion when I was about 5 weeks and they were worse than useless, they confirmed that I was pregnant (like the 8 tests I had done were all wrong, lol) and asked me to call my local early pregnancy unit the next day.
I was then scanned every 7 days, healthy heartbeat detected on the second scan when I was just over 6 weeks, so we began to relax and I actually began to enjoy all the aches and pains - they were signs that my baby was taking all it needed from me!

Sadly I ended up miscarrying again in August, however I have been assured that there is every chance I will go on to have a healthy baby.
I have been offered testing as it is very unusual to have multiple miscarriages with the same partner at my age (I'm only 23) but I am too scared to get anything done about it!

I know this is a long and rambling post but I just wanted to say big hugs - I know how hard it is to lose a baby and to not be able to enjoy a pregnancy for the fear that something will go wrong. I have not had to go through the pain of IVF but I have a feeling that I will need to go down that route in the future. I can't imagine how difficult that must have been for you.
Ectopic pregnancies are rare, and it is rare for them to cause any issues until after the 6 week mark. Have you contacted your local early pregnancy unit? I know it is dishonest but a heartbeat can sometimes be detected before the 6 week mark - I had fluttering at 5.5! It might be worth making your dates slightly different and asking for a scan. If you say that you have had pain they should scan you, especially given your history.
Congratulations by the way! I'm sure in 8 months you will be posting on here telling us that you have a beautiful healthy baby

[pacer]

They will know when they scan you and i hope that you go on to have a happy successful pregnancy xx

[spacebunnyx]

Thank you all so much for your posts. I feel like after all the heartache me and my OH have been through I should be over the moon with happiness and excitement - its reassuring to know that others have had similar fears.

ElizabethJane - I'm so glad the IVF worked out for you. Its such a tough thing to have to go through - emotionally and physically. Your idea of starting relaxation is perfect - my CBT therapist gave me a CD last week and she says she wants me to listen to it! I haven't as yet but will start today - it can only help!

Justina - I'm sorry you also had an ectopic. Can I just ask, did you go on to have a successful pregnancy after? Also did you bleed when you were having the ep? the fact i'm not bleeding is keeping me off the edge!

Lo - I'm so sorry about your miscarriages . That must have been so tough. You're right though - you are young and the chances of having a successful pregnancy in the future and really high - and there is sooo much that they can do now (and the technology is improving all the time). Great tip about the slight fibbing! I think I might try that when I speak to my GP tomorrow. I'm going to ask to be referred asap to the epu.

Pacer - really hope they scan me soon! thank you, i hope so too!

xxx

[lo89]

You just refer yourself to the epu! Get there number online and give them a call. The minute they know your history and that you are having pain, you should get a scan. That being said, pain is totally normal in early pregnancy!

[justina]

Yes I started bleeding when I had the ectopic pregnancy, and pregnancy tests started showing negative, then positive, then negative... which I then learned is a typical symptom of ectopic pregnancy.
I had a successful pregnancy a few months later and I know other people who also had successful pregnancies after ectopics.
I wish you all luck with this pregnancy!

[HIBISCUS30]

hi

I understand how you feel i too suffered an ectopic pregnancy in january last year ruptured and lost alot of blood, they dont know how far i was but was def over 6 weeks, since then thankfully i had a baby boy in march or this year. When i found i was pregnant with him i was convinced it was another ectopic, pain in right side all the symptoms was a mess untill my 6 week scan but it all turned out fine, your mind wil be playing tricks on you making you feel those twinges, but also in a normal pregnancy you get pains early on its normal, try to stay calm i know all to well its hard but you have to think of the little one inside of you, will be happy to talk some more if you want to x

[spacebunnyx]

thanks for the messages. just to keep you posted have been to the gp this evening who felt my tum and I'm tender on one side. Have been referred to the early pregnancy unit tomorrow morning. fingers crossed... xxx