17 weeks pregnant. Please help me.

[Louise1234]

Hello,

Basically i am 17 weeks pregnant! i am very very happy and excited but i am also very scared because i had a M/C Earlier this year. but i am seriously frightened of everything! Like i carry on with my normal activities during the day and i know what to eat and what not to eat etc.

But im so frightend of all the bad things that can happen during pregnany!! Like if you start to get any swelling it can be very dangerous for you and the baby and you dont get many symptoms from it, i only know this because like an idiot i sit on the laptop and google everything!!!! And im just so frighted that there is something wrong with me and the baby. or later on in the pregnancy me or the baby is going to devlop something that wont be caught in time. Wow i sound like some crazy woman but i just want my baby to be healthy and im so worried because of what happened earlier this year.

If anyone else has ever felt like this, like extra worried about eveything in pregnancy then can you please give me some advice or reasurance please this would be really helpful!! please!!

Thank youu x x

[Annie0904]

Oh Louise I really feel for you and what you are going through as I have had 4 miscarriages but I also have had 3 healthy pregnancies and 3 beautiful healthy children. I became really anxious when I was pregnant with my daughter after 2 miscarriages and hardly dare do anything as I was so scared something would happen again. The fact that you have now got to 17 weeks is a really good sign and I am sure you are having regular scans to reassure you. Enjoy your pregnancy and look forward to having a lovely baby. If you want to ask anything please pm me. xxx

[lo89]

Hey,
I can totally relate to the panic caused in pregnancy after a miscarriage - and how scary google can make pregnancy for a health anxiety sufferer!
I have suffered two miscarriages in the past two and a half years - the most recent of which, I would have been due on my birthday - the 29th of March next year.
My first pregnancy was quite straightforward (until I miscarried obviously) I did not really google any symptoms, I felt fairly well in myself, and didn't change my lifestyle too dramatically, aside from cutting down on cola slightly (I used to drink about 1.5l of full fat cola a day! Ick!) and drinking more water - and obvously steering clear of alcohol and not letting anyone smoke around me.
After miscarrying I had horrible guilt - did I somehow cause it? I obviously didn't eat healthy enough. It must be because I am a vegetarian! I must have not got enough vitamins. I should not have had such a warm bath! Basically not able to understand that it was not anything I had done which caused it.
Anyway fast forward two years and I find myself pregnant again - unplanned, may I add! Myself and my boyfriend are both shocked but we know we can manage, and start to view flats, plan colour schemes and even discuss names.
Once the initial wave of excitement wears off, I begin to panic - big time! I cut out all caffeine, drink nothing but water and occasional fruit juice, become fanatical about getting my five a day, I even start eating meat and fish - I check everything on google before I eat or drink it, won't touch anything without hand sanitising myself after it (I am convinced my first miscarriage was due to swine flu which I had whilst I was pregnant but before I found out, therefore I didn't get any treatment) and wouldn't even let my boyfriend near me after he had smoked - he had to wash his hands and brush his teeth - I googled every single symptom which I had, from itchy boobs to headaches to strange eating habits and mood swings - and panicked that there was some symptoms I didn't have, such as sickness. Literally every symptom of pregnancy caused me worry, one way or another. I couldn't concentrate on anything apart from keeping the little baby inside me alive - There was not one thing I could have done differently, yet I still miscarried!
Try to relax and enjoy pregnancy - I wish I had! I know how worrying it can be, but I know from googling things that currently you are in the safest trimester for your baby - chances of something going wrong in your second trimester are less than one percent - yes it does happen but what are the chances of something happening to your second consecutive pregnancy? Less than 1% after you get beyond 12 weeks. Can you feel movement yet?

[potato11]

Hi Louise

I'm a Midwife so I can help you with any questions you might have. Obviously I can't diagnose anything over the internet but I can help you understand things.

You are monitored closely during pregnancy (especially your first) and there are usually "drop-in" clinics you can attend in between scheduled appointments, if your worried about anything at all or need any forms filling in i.e for mat leave

The swelling you mentioned is common in pregnancy around the feet and ankles; but it also happens that it can also be a sign of 'pre-eclampsia' - which you are monitored closely for through blood pressure and urine checks.

Pre-eclampsia usually occurs after 30 weeks of pregnancy and is rarely missed if you attend for all your checkups, and report symptoms to your Midwife such as
*prolonged headaches
*visual disturbances
*pain from the liver region (on your right just under the breasts)
*swelling of the hands and face, or severe swelling of feet and ankles

You will hear and read lots of horror stories, but the reality is that there are thousands of women each year who have healthy pregnancies and uneventful births, they just don't make the news (or get much air time on one born every minute!)

Hope that helps a bit xx

[sparkle_1979]

Can totally relate. I had two mc and now have two girls and was the worlds worst preg woman. My mum said it was the longest preg in history as I was constantly on the phone worrying about something. All I can say is u r passed the scary stage, you need to relax. Are u a member of a baby preg forum as this helped. If I had a concern then I could go there and realise that things I was experiencing were normal preg symptoms. Xxx

[Louise1234]

Thank you all so much for your replies!!! it means alot for everyone giving me this advice!!!

I know i should start to relax im just so worried! i just counting down the days till my next scan!! which should be in December and that will be my last scan if the baby is okay! i wish they gave you more scans!

Thank you again to all of you to replying to me and giving me such good advice! Thank you all so much!! x xx xxx

---------- Post added at 20:19 ---------- Previous post was at 20:12 ----------

I also forgot to answer, i havent really felt any movements yet, which also scares me :( xx

[lo89]

When are you due?
Aw I know how awful it is not to get any more scans - I had weekly scans throughout the start of my pregnancy and I just loved seeing how much change there was between the scans - I was totally mesmerised by it! Then once they had a healthy heartbeat they said no more scans as there was only a very slim chance of anything going wrong after they detected a heartbeat - I begged for another scan and they eventually agreed to do one, but I had to wait two weeks rather than just one - that is when I found out I had miscarried! Glad I insisted on further scans!
Could you afford to go for a private 3d scan at some point? I know a few people who have had it done and they said it has really helped calm them down, plus makes a good souvenir! They have booked it as a deal through groupon.

[Annie0904]

You don't usually feel baby move until between 18 and 22 weeks so don't worry xx

[Louise1234]

lo89 - yes i had a few scans at the beging too because i was getting alot of pain, still do :/ and oh im really sorry to hear that!!!! if you dont mind me asking was your M/C in the first trimester?? I M/C this year also when i was around 8 weeks. :( Yes i didnt think of that i will defo be booking in for a 3D scan for sure. Thank you so much for your reply!!!

Annie0904-Oh thank goodness for that i have been so worried!!!xxx

[lo89]

Pain is totally normal - I was really worried about all the pains I was having, my partners sister - who has two kids - laughed at me and told me that I don't know what pain is until I give birth! She had pain with her second (not her first though) and the second is now a happy, hyper, beautiful 3 and a half year old!
Yes both my miscarriages were in the first trimester - the first one was at around 6-7 weeks and the second happened sometime between 7 and 9, they cannot be 100% sure exactly when as apparently it shrinks when it dies, it was measuring 6 weeks and 5 days but that doesn't work out with my dates, I noticed symptoms dying down slightly at around 8 weeks but I also developed morning sickness at about 8 weeks so can't really be sure.

Your due date must be around about when I would have been due - March/April time? The reason I was asking about movement is because my friend didn't feel any movement until 24 weeks - until she realised that 'gas' had been the baby haha! She is now 5 months old and gorgeous!