Christmas Survival Strategys

[Lissa101]

I guess this is a time of year when many of us are feeling the strain. It's my first xmas with anxiety problems and I've already decided that I'll not drink any alcohol and I'll make sure to try and find some quiet, private time for myself if possible. Does anyone have any other tips to stop anxiety going crazy?

x

[Liziik]

Praise yourself for everything you manage to do xx

[fozzy is crying]

Wish I had some tips. Just as any day of the year I am trapped at home alone.

[NoPoet]

Hmm... this topic is pretty painful for me, as I find myself experincing emotional pain along with joy at Christmas. I think I'm worried at the back of my mind that our happiness is going to be ruined by someone dying, or some terrible event happening, and this Christmas will be the last one. It's horrible to think ahead to next Christmas being without someone.

The easy answer is we are catastrophising. We feel worse at Christmas because everyone else seems so happy and they expect us to be happy too.

The best solution is to respect yourself. If you need alone time, take it. Hyper-vigilance is not going to make parties and busy environments easy to deal with, which is why people like us can struggle with them. If you respect yourself, know your limitations and work within them without banging against them and complaining about them, life suddenly starts to get a lot easier!

[swgrl09]

christmas brings up very bad memories for me so this time of year is especially hard. had a mental breakdown last night ... so not sure what tips i can offer other than have somebody who you trust that you can talk to, and if you don't have somebody, feel free to talk to me! (or many others on this forum who have been so supportive for me)

[NoPoet]

Bloody hell, you're doing better than some of us if you can post advice here the day after a breakdown

[swgrl09]

sometimes doing good things for others, like volunteering if you are able to go out, can be helpful as well.

---------- Post added at 14:29 ---------- Previous post was at 14:29 ----------

lol not doing that great, just getting through, but thanks. i don't always take my own advice very well.

---------- Post added at 14:31 ---------- Previous post was at 14:29 ----------

funny this has come up, as i work in a senior citizen apartment building and next week i have arranged for an agency to give a talk on holiday stress and beating the blues ... i'll take notes and post any good info

[fishman65]

Well for me,xmas day is the one to get through.That's the day we are at my daughter's,so I suppose the obvious and easiest answer is alcohol.People are expected to drink at xmas? Or at least its acceptable

[Lost2010]

Hi Lissa,

Can understand how you feel as I'm dreading Christmas as well, lot of people visiting = increased anxiety and panic attacks for me so it's not an enjoyable time of year. If you have somewhere you can go to escape and try and relax for a while that sometimes help (perhaps some music/films on your phone or walkman?) For some reason I look forward to getting past the shortest day of the year as it kind of signals that we're 'on the other side of winter' and it will soon be over. Xmas can be a hard time for people with anxiety so don't stress yourself if your symptoms flare up a bit, just do what you need to do to try and stay as relaxed as possible.

[Tessar]

Hi Lissa101.
I can relate to you feeling the strain at this time of year. I tend not to drink any alcohol at all these days but rather than being a conscious decision, i dont think i like it that much. i end up with such ridiculously rosy cheeks it makes me feel self-conscious. i think that some quiet, private time for myself sounds a great i mean, why not? a bit of relaxation - its a great idea.
i also feel the same about looking forward to getting past the shortest day of the year; it's gonna get better after that. yipee.
The words alcohol & christmas dont sit well for me; i had brothers that always got drunk; i dont like christmas much as it reminds me of bad times but i want to make my own new memories of good times now. your idea of peace & quiet is good; my partner & I have tried to always ensure we have time to ourselves and that works well for us. i decided this year to cut out speaking with or visiting people who are not beneficial to me, people who stress me or are bad for me generally. i'm already thinking that's been a good decision. its liberating.

i have to say it's quite sad to read other people's posts about this time of year being painful. i wish i didnt relate to that but i do. at least i am discovering that i'm not alone & there are some nice kind folk on this site who are full of support.
the irony for me is that i organised our work xmas meal last year & because everyone said i did such a good job.....I'm doing it this year too. if they only knew how i felt!!!! still, i do try to remind myself that some people do genuinely enjoy having a good time & if i can contribute to that, i'll feel good about it. i've got almost all my xmas presents sorted now but am struggling with getting cards written. it does seem like a burden every year. i would say stuff it, but there are nieces/nephews & friends to think about. i suppose as well some people dont have much to shout about at the moment with the country's economic state being what it is they want to have something to enjoy. ooh, getting a bit heavy here!!
I like PsychoPoet's post below - how very true about taking alone time. also Hyper-vigilance ..... i so relate to that. but do remind myself what i learned in cbt. i will go to our xmas work meal & enjoy it as best i can - after all i work with some really great people & spending time with them is good. sometimes i surprise myself, once i get there. last years was actually good fun. so fingers crossed.