Prepare to laugh at my disasterous morning

[Tessar]

OK....let's set the scene.... it's my office Christmas Meal tonight & I want to look my best. As it was pouring with rain when I was getting ready this morning, in an effort to keep my hair pristene, I decided to wash my hair after I fed the birds..... Only issue - it was dark.
So I've got the bird seed & I'm walking over to the feeders.... next thing I know I'm wondering why the world is feeling a bit funny wobbly .... & in the dark I had't pick up on the fact I was slipping over, very slowly it seemed.
Anyway, I broke luckily the tub of bird seed helped to break my but I did have to laugh alot when I noticed the tub of seed had broken into about a million pieces. Fortunatley no permanent damage done to me tho I was a little muddly in places & have a couple of bruises. Apparently I made enough noise that my partner heard me indoors!
Well, the birds have a full tub to feast on today, very considerately spread across the floor by me. No doubt they will all be so fat tonite they wont be able to take off.
Anyway, having dusted myself off, got changed & done my hair, I was finally ready to leave for work. Albeit late, I was pleased to be on my way. Except, 5 mins down the road & realised I'd forgotten my shoes for the office "do" later so had to go back for them. I was ONLY 40 mins late for work!!!! Eeek, luckily I have good bosses & my story has made my colleagues laugh. Honestly, what a polarva. The "do" tonight had better be fun. It makes me chuckle that I, the one with social anxiety, is the person who has organised the meal for the last 2 years & no-one I work with has a clue about me getting nervous about it! Still, I have great colleagues & am hoping once I get there it's going to be a good night. Update to come tomorrow, hopefully no more slips (I hasten to add that I have a history of slipping over in the garden & have had physio on my shoulders as a result so glad I'm in one piece)!

[BobbyDog]

Things can only get better, all the best.

[Annie0904]

Pleased to hear you have survived the morning with no injuries. the birds will be thinking it is Christmas day already! I hope you enjoy your evening and no more falling over! x

[Magic]

So glad you are ok after the fall tessar. Hope you have a lovely time this evening.
Take care

[paranoidtree]

oh bless you! glad you are ok after your trip! the birds are very lucky indeed. hope you have a good evening!

[Tessar]

Cheers everyone....
I am nervous about my office xmas meal later but once I get there I know it'll be ok. CBT helped me alot with social anxiety & I work with a great bunch of people. The best bit about tonight will be knowing that all my colleagues will have fun at a meal I have arranged.
Also, I remind myself that it doesnt matter how much I say. I've done my bit now & can sit & listen if I like. There's no pressure for me to entertain everyone. We are a group & can all contribute. I know too that sometimes sayling less is actually better than trying to force it. Plus, I enjoy listening to people's conversations. One thing I like doing is saying something that starts a long conversation. It might happen like that, it might not. But I shall be there to enjoy myself. After all our bosses are paying for the meal & thats very kind of them.
I'm giving 2 colleagues a lift to the pub.... they're big blokes & I dont like one of them. How generous is that, giving him a lift! I'm kind & sometimes that involves doing things even for people I'm not keen on, but it's no trouble. I did take several measures to ensure I would be as relaxed about this as possible:
- I dont cope with drunk people at all well so have ensured I can be in control about when I leave
- I'm not driving anyone home so I can leave when I'm ready
- I've been absolutely boiling in the office today, the heat/airlessness is stifling. Its me hormones :-( I do wish they didnt make me so darn hot but because I know they can (and are at the moment) I wont be drinking alcohol. It would just make me go red & start sweating.
- I've chosen clothes I like (lightweight to keep me cool as well)
- I've kept busy at work today
So as you can see I've done everything possible not to get apprehensive. This is a success story for me because pre-CBT I'd have been a wreck today. But I dont dread things anymore, I keep myself busy & wont allow myself to over-think it. I used to really panic about going out, especially with colleagues. But preparation is the key for me now.
Oh well, wish me luck ..... ps: there are no plans to fall over again today

[Tessar]

SURVIVED MY WORK CHRIASTMAS MEAL
--------------------------------------
Well folks, I did it. I survived. I even had to drive not just 2 but 3 colleagues to the pub AND one of them was my boss (whom I admire). So, despite all that pressure, I just drove along (as if they werent in the car) & I got to the pub without incident. Infact, the other 3 were chatting away quite happily. When I dropped them off they were all really grateful for the lift. Plus, instead of feeling in awe of my boss, I felt sort of special for being able to give her a lift.
At the meal, I ended up sitting next to someone I dont like (reminds me of my horrible brother) & on the other side was our other boss who isnt always that sociable. But you know what? I got through it. The chap who I dont like was actually very chatty & didnt ignore me as I'd thought he might. My boss was quite chatty too. I think he will chat to people he likes.... so he must like me as we chatted away qutie happily.

I made myself focus on other people, I didnt focus on myself & worry about what anyone might think. I was there to be me & I know my colleagues like ME. So I wasnt going to let my past insecurities get the better of me.

3/4 of the way through when people were starting to get a bit the worse for wear, I was beginning to think it's time to go. I cant cope with drunk people (too many bad reminders & they feel like a threat to me) there's no point denying that. I had visions of leaving in a hurry & then needing to stop on the way home because I would need to cry. But I stuck it out.

Despite planning it so I wouldnt need to give anyone a lift home, I then got asked, as a favour to drive someone home. I was really put on the spot & didnt have a good reason to say know as he lives round the corner form me. He'd drunk masses & I was dreading it but as a decent person I said yes. I would not have said yes if I thought he'd have got ill but I knew he could "hold his drink" I did it.

I Just told myself (again) to drive naturally & that since he was drunk his conversation would probably not be up to much & he wouldnt remember much about the journey (a good 30 min drive). As it happens, he was very chatty. In fact it was a really good conversation. He even asked me how my family are since my brother died in Feb this year. I thought that was a very kind thing for him to do since it can be hard to people to ask others when someone's died. Plus he thought I was about 10 years younger than I actually am. He was really shocked to find out my real age (not that I hide it or anything). So I guess doing him this favour paid off.

We had an enjoyable meal that our bosses paid for. All my colleauges had a good evening & I can feel proud that I arranged the meal & made sure everyone got there ok. Also I handled myself well & didnt let past insecurities spoil my evening. Of course I was tired next morning as it was a very late night for me but it was all well endured & worth it in the end.

Because I'd been around alot of drunk people, it did remind me of bad times (with my drunken brothers & how awful they were). But these things are at the forefront of my mind at the moment due to work i'm doing in counselling. Although it isnt nice to have the reminders, the work I'm doing is actually gradually offloading the past from my mind & helping me deal with it. So despite the difficult feelings it brought up, I am using the experience to help me work through my difficulties.

All in all a positive evening & well worth the effort.

[ammiemum]

brilliant