increased from 10-20 mg

[swgrl09]

I know, right? Just to feel a little improvement instead of worse would be nice. I think your body is just confused right now and needs to settle down. I hope that's the case for me too.

I know you are right about the diazepam. My fiance says that the fact I even am concerned that I will get addicted when taking it as prescribed means that I will be fine. I was given them for a reason, gotta remind myself of that.

[karenp]

I was on Diazepam for months SWGRL09 and started off at 20mg's then went down to nothing over a period of weeks and didn't feel anything at all (bad that is) and I've come off Lorazepam 3 times before which is meant to be even more addictive totally fine just by tapering correctly. The only thin I ever did have terrible withdrawal from is Mirtazapine but even though it was horrible at the time I cam ethrough it pretty quickly looking back and I am so much better on Cipralex after 2 months than I was the whole time I took Mirtazapine for 8 months ):

[swgrl09]

oh wow, my doc has prescribed me 2 mg to help me calm my mind when i cannot sleep so i guess i won't worry about taking it as long as i don't overdo it lol that helped a lot, thanks

---------- Post added at 16:52 ---------- Previous post was at 16:19 ----------

took a nap and woke up, just got out of the shower and now i feel really sick ... nauseous, hot, light-headed ... what is going on, this can't all be the meds as it wasn't like this when i started on 10 way back in august

---------- Post added at 17:07 ---------- Previous post was at 16:52 ----------

fiance says it sounds like i am getting a cold ... i dont feel like it though. i really don't know at this point. then the stupid HA voice goes "lymphoma!!!!" lol

[karenp]

You def don't have Lymphoma I am sure darl (: It probs is the pills you know or even anxiety playing tricks as when I was very anxious this past weekend I was convinved I was going to have a stroke and I don't normally worry about my physical health as I had my M.O.T not to slong ago and am a picture of health physically (LOL) Mentally I am really getting there finally again! I've found Cipralex to be a brilliant ad so far.

[swgrl09]

Oh good, I am glad you are improving still and doing so well. It is disheartening because I was doing really well on 10 mg for a couple months and then when the holidays came around I went downhill fast. First, wasn't sure if it was just life that was getting me down, but the depression hung on for a while so they upped me to 20.

I feel slightly less depressed today. Last night was able to go out with some friends, which got my mind off of things. Anxiety is still there, I can feel it shoot through me like an electric charge. I know that takes longer to get better.

Still, my sleep is bad. I take my pill in the morning but still am not sleeping soundly. I can fall asleep now, but I wake up and then am wired and cannot go back to sleep.

I also have a lot of nightmares which get in the way of sleep too.

---------- Post added at 09:39 ---------- Previous post was at 09:38 ----------

But, baby steps, right?

[swgrl09]

I think I am slowly improving. A bit less depressed, although still got anxiety. I am expecting my depression to return this weekend though when we bury my mom's ashes, but that would happen if I had depression or not.

Last night I slept a little better and did not take any diazepam. I still woke up at 3 AM after a bad dream, but only took maybe 20 minutes to get back to sleep instead of an hour of tossing and turning. I also am trying some new pillows for my neck pain.

I have had a bad headache but I think this is from my neck problems ... still trying to find a good pillow.

I also have been clenching my jaw at night. My jaw muscles are so tense.

[karenp]

Thinking of you burrying your Moms ashes
I get quite a few head aches with Escitalopram too but don't know if it's the actual meds or my anxiety first thing...once again my thoughts are with your at this distressing time xxx

[katy2104]

I will be thinking of you too, you are bound to feel anxious about this as it is such a big deal - this is your beloved Mum and we only ever have one. I know I felt really anxious about putting a temporary cross on my dads grave on new years day (we have to wait for the stone) He is buried next to my sis and it was hard but also a relief. I sometimes visit the cemetary just to feel close to them. I took 2 of my nieces to town yesterday to be measured for new underwear. I had a panic attack in M&S and cried but you know those girls are so brave, they comforted me. I love them so much. God bless your Mum, she will be smiling down on you and giving you strength xx

[swgrl09]

thank you both so much for your support it is so appreciated. we don't have a stone yet either, katy. that will take time to get. i just sat near her ashes at the house the other day and didn't want to leave her ...

[karenp]

Hopefully when you both get your head stones it will help bring you some comfort, just having somewhere to go and be near to your loved ones. I know I always find visiting my Grandparents grave a comfort and putting flowers there for them xxxx