I feel fed up with this week already!

[Sparkle1984]

I feel fed up with this week already, and it's only Wednesday! I've had so much bad news and mishaps this week.

The worst thing is that yesterday I heard the news that one of my best friend's Mum had died. This happened very suddenly and came as a big shock. I always got on well with my friend's Mum, and she was very kind to me especially when my friend and I were at high school. My friend is only 28 and obviously you don't expect to lose one of your parents at that age. I really feel for her.

There has been a lot of pressure at work recently. An urgent project came up last week, which meant I had to stop most of my other work in order to get this project completed on time. Therefore, a backlog has built up. This week, the project managers have been fighting over my time, and even though it's the team manager's responsibility to deal with this (which he has done, by negotiating with the project managers in question), it's still stressful, although I'm coping with it a lot better than I would have done 6 months ago.

The other stressful thing is that I'm organising a meal out with my social club this Saturday, and I originally had 5 people confirm they'd be attending, so I booked a table for 6 (I always book an extra seat in case someone wants to come along at the last minute). However, this evening I had a text message from a couple saying they can no longer attend, so I'm now down to 3 confirmed attendees (including myself). I get on well with that couple so I'm disappointed they can't make it. As for the 2 people who are still going: one of them I've never met, and the other is someone I'm not particularly close to, so I'm feeling more anxious about the event. However, I'm determined to go ahead with the meal, even if there will be only 3 of us.

Also, I'm trying to arrange an evening out with my friends over Easter, but one of my friends still hasn't got back to me (not the one whose mother died, this is a different friend), even though I've texted her twice, which means I can't make any further arrangements until I know what day suits her best.

I didn't get to sleep until late last night as I was upset about my friend's mother dying, and I didn't get home until quite late yesterday evening anyway as I was at a work's evening out. So I feel rather tired today and fed up! It feels like all this stuff is getting to me!

[Serenitie]

I'm so sorry to hear that you're having such a rough time

Allow yourself to grieve and acknowledge that you are having a difficult time in response to things that are happening in your life.

In spite of this difficult time you have acknowledged that you are coping better with work pressures than you would have 6 months ago and you are still socialising in spite of the difficulties this presents you with. This is real progress. Give yourself the credit that you deserve for these achievements

Sometimes as anxiety sufferers, we expect ourselves to be superhuman and able to cope with whatever comes our way, as a kind of overcompensation to feel like we are still doing well and moving forward. Life doesn't work this way. Even if you did not suffer with anxiety, you would be feeling pretty fed up with the week's events. This has been a really bad week for you. Next week will be better.

Give yourself some breathing space, get plenty of rest even if you're not sleeping well, be patient and be kind to yourself. I hope that you are feeling much better really soon

[ElizabethJane]

Sorry you are having a tough time. Sending hugsEJXx

[Sparkle1984]

Thank you for your kind words, Cat and Elizabeth.

I'm feeling a bit better now, especially now that it's the weekend and I'll have some time to chill out.

I sent my friend a sympathy card, and she received in the post this morning and sent me a text to say thank you. I said that she and her family are in my thoughts. I'll catch up with her every now and then to make sure she is OK.

In the end, I decided to postpone that meal with my social club. I didn't want to cancel it outright as I felt that I would be avoiding the situation and that would make me feel worse. I came to this decision after discussing it with my step dad. He said it would be best to postpone it until after Easter, when more people may be able to attend. In this way, I don't feel like I'm avoiding the situation, as I'll still be organising the meal, but just a couple of weeks later than I originally planned. I figured that if I delayed it, I may be able to get 7 or 8 attendees instead of just 3.

My evening out with my friends is booked - we'll be going out for a meal and then go bowling. It's actually for my belated birthday party - my birthday was last month but I always hold my celebration meal at Easter as one of my friends lives away and she comes back to visit at Easter and Christmas.

My workload isn't looking quite as scary now, as I've managed to make progress on a couple of major tasks. So hopefully next week will be a little bit quieter!

Anyway, have a good weekend!