Spec savers messed my glasses up and I developed bad head dizzy spells blurred vision, after 12 weeks the mistake was spotted, I was left with slight depression and anxiety and sleep problems and kill thoughts :(. The doctor gave me 100mg of trazdone, and every was ok for 2 weeks I could dismiss thoughts and my sleep was so much better. Then I went to see a therapist and she set all my symptoms off again she said I had obbsesive thoughts, however she never have me any information. So I came home and stupidly typed it into google, it was the worsed thing I have done as it led to me looking up paranoid skizo, I looked at stories and symptoms.

Since then I'm completely obsessed with it, my mind tries to fit every symptom into my life and make up different scenarios(spelling) at the moment it's did you hear or see that I actually went to my gp and described every thing and he said anxiety, it's like my mind wants to believe everything I see or hear and I can't keep going on, sometimes I get a little break, of someone says something I might start thinking about that for a couple of days but always go back to skizo. It's all wizzing around my head 24 7, and I'm scared its going to start interfering with my work. As for sleep I can have 2-4 good nights maybe get up for an hour around 3-4 am, other nights I won't sleep at all but don't suffer from it maybe abit of a headaches.
I'm sick of feeling down mostly when I can't sleep i get really weepy and think whats the point and been snappy :(. Sometimes I can lie in bed and my mind make up little stories then ill think eh and forget about it or most of it.

My dreams are so real like to, but the doc said that's properly the trazdone. He's now taking me down to 50mg and has referred me to a specialist, as he wants to try and get the right med and now I'm scared he's give up and I might get locked away. It just like a constant battle with what my mind wants to believe. Is this really just anxiety, could I ask you to be careful what you put as I don't want to start worrying over something else thanks.

Forgot to mention any thought I get I have to tell a family member, if I can't I feel uneasy. I go out abit more than i used to, and i dont really care about spending money. When i don't sleep i don't feel any diffrent for it apart from abit of a headache and irratable. Night time is the worse as its all like a runaway mine train. Last night it was the devil walks around, but that was most likely the tv show we were watching earlier, or when i posted on another forum and someone said the devil is after you :(and it's just like my mind puts its own little twist on it. Do you think the tablets could be making it worse, as since then it's like I Believe anything. And it's my fault for reading such rubbish, so when I do get thoughts I constantly worry did I read this I hope I did
in all fairness i have brought alot of this on my self, i should not have read everything about paraniod skizophrinia as my mind is doing its best to put its own little twist on it, and i will admit i have become paranoid. I have been to the doctor and told him everything and some thought examples, and he said as long as i can dismiss them, im ok. The thing is sometimes i can and sometimes i can't and sometimes i have to tell someone. Im just scared i have something bad. He gave me 15mg of Mirtazapine for obbsessive thoughts/anxiety and depression
i came off the trazdone last saturday and everything was mostly ok till yesturday.

Everything has now flooded back and i dont know where to turn. Anything i see or hear is either devil,aliens or are stuff bugged (like i wanna check stuff) or anything weird that happens i blame it on that, and my mind keeps making up new stuff up, feels like someones putting the thoughts there if that make sence

I DONT beleive it, but its hard not to. I just wish i could get these thoughts to go away

And when I get really down I think should I just say I can see this or that. I just can't believe I've let it get this bad. And if I'm not constantly worrying of the above, my mind is always looking for something else for me to think about it. I do get worried as the thoughts just come without even thinking. Before my mam said just putting something in my secret place never quite heard her, but I just thought what is she hiding from me. Even though I know deep down there's nothing to it. It just feels like it's something new everyday