On the way up thanks to St John's Wort

[MrsStobe13]

Earlier this week I posted about trying natural remedies for anxiety and intrusive thoughts. Since Monday, I've been taking 668mg St John's Wort extract and a Rescue Remedy pastille as and when needed (only 2 since Monday!) I've also purchased Imp of the Mind and Brain Lock, the CBT advice and exposure advice (talking about my thoughts) has already helped dramatically. By learning I'm not alone, I already feel much happier and calmer in myself. I will of course, only be talking to carefully selected people away from NMP about my thoughts from now on. I spoke to my OCD-suffering neighbour last night and after talking and laughing about how 'silly we were' she just said "no you're not alone, Helen, believe me". That was the turning point that made me realise that these thoughts were NOT real, they were not a threat and there is a whole world of difference between my thoughts and my urges. Though they might feel like urges, when I get to the kitchen I've no desire to pick up a knife. In fact, the only reason the knives were so threatening to me was because I percieved them as a threat. I managed to make our curry last night and stay in the kitchen long enough to make myself fruit and custard (a nice little reward for me!) plus stand in front of the knife block for 5 minutes, realising that there was no desire there. My only downfall is that I worry how I'll react when angry/frustrated with my husband, though I am now going to find some anger management techniques so I can feel more in control.

A little bit to leave you smiling, I was reading Imp of the Mind and I told my husband that these intrusive thoughts have lead to divorces, then shamefully admitted I had contemplated divorce only a few weeks after getting married to protect my husband from a "psycho killer". The response to which was "not a chance, it takes two to make a marriage and two to make a divorce, and no way am I letting that happen". I'm sure half of the reason I'm dealing with these thoughts so quickly is down to the support of so many wonderful people!

Thanks all for your help, hopefully I'll be doing a little more helping and a little less asking soon!

MrsS x

[aggiecuttler]

thats great well done you glad the natural remedy is working its magic keep going blessings

[daisydaisy]

Mrs S wasn't sure which thread to reply to.

I'm so sorry things have been so tough again recently but I'm really happy you are starting to find things that are working for you. I know it feels like you are alone but I promise you you're not. I have the suicidal or anxiety thoughts around knives too etc but I just sort of let them go and you're right recognising you are not alone is a massive step to moving forward. I'll try and reply on your other thread too. Keep up the good work Mrs S and can I just say wow what a fantastic partner you have. Xxx