Stopping myself from sliding into depression.

[ElizabethJane]

I am not depressed at the moment but I am aware that I could be on the edge of a mood change. I have had a period of prolonged stress which is now nearly over. My hospital stay was not pleasant but I coped. It seems that my body goes into extreme coping mode. I could have had longer off work to rest after my operation but I decided to go back because if I'm off it would begin to affect my mental health. I can't swim at the moment because of the op which would help with my mood. I'm sleeping ok but waking early but then it could be because of the extreme heat we have all been having. It is definitely like a mind shift- pushing away the negative mood and weepiness. My S rings the bells at Church and wanted me to find the Westminster Abbey Royal Cambridge Surprise Peal tears were pouring down my face. Why?? Depression is a state of mind for me but it has also been a way of life for me for such a long time. It is usually accompanied by paranoia, sleep disturbances and low mood. Recently I had a 'blip' with my medication. Even through all that I managed to tap into some sort of 'super energy' it was like flicking a switch. Interesting?Anyone else feel like this? EJ

[Speranza]

I recognise what you're talking about. Not currently - I could do with that burst of energy right now, but I keep dozing off!!

[ElizabethJane]

The energy thing was very odd - never had it before. At least if I am sliding towards depression I know how to stop it.EJ

[Elen]

EJ so sorry to hear that you are struggling.

On a positive note you know the signs to look out for which is half the battle.

Try and concentrate on the positives, you managed your hospital stay, you have gone back to work these are both things to be proud off.

Be kind to yourself and hopefully this will pass for you.

tc Elen

[Tessar]

I often feel that way. I wonder sometimes why I consider myself depressed as I probably am not. Maybe it's because I know it's important to keep fighting, that if I am mindful I will get depressed if I don't keep busy, get stuck in at work, take exercise etc.... Then yes I might be depressed again,
It's odd but I have been feeling so much better. Doing so much more. Challenging myself and beginning to win the battle. But lying underneath that is the same as you, a fear I'll go back there.
I wonder why we feel like this? I have read other posters make similar comments too.
What I will say is that you have been through a lot lately. If you re-read your post and think about what you list there (& no doubt this isn't a list of everything you have been through of late as there are bound to be other things you could have noted as well) .... It's quite alot isn't it?
Especially having hospital treatment. That's a big deal in my book.
Dont underestimate how much that will have taken out of you. And even now it's still hampering your every day life.
I relate to your keenness to get back to work, to protect your mental health, but don't forget your body will be reacting to having been operated on.
Give yourself a break...... Tears? Frustration? Tiredness? Jaded? Much of what's happening is your body asking you to slow down. There is nothing wrong with that. Also it doesn't mean the inevitable is going to happen.
Also it's really good that you shared. These things are happening because of what life has thrown at you lately, someone who hasn't experienced depression might feel as you do right now.
Well, EJ, you look after yourself & remember that even though you are feeling this change going on, it's probably something you can manage. A temporary issue that can be resolved.
Bye for now and hugs too.

[ElizabethJane]

Thanks Tessar and Elen xx