I am suffering from anxiety and depression

[KX501]

hello everone

Hi I am 35 and live in bournemouth. I have not been on ths site since a year and half ago when i needed it most. Since my last visit I spent some time feeling ok but overall it has been a rollecoaster and it lead me to resigning from my job earlier in the year, more indepth counselling and now 40mg of citalopram. I did find a job to keep the money coming in as I am on my own and have a 15 year old to look after but I still struggle with my problem. Today I cant stop crying and the thought of facing people tomorrow is scaring me allready. This has completely come out of the blue again.
I hope i feel better and try and make it in to wor but part of me wants to see my doctor and go on the sick - I just dont think im fit for any work at the moment.
I hve seen lots of therapists over the years as this is something that has gone and then returned. For the first time I spoke to my doctor and a specific counsellor to address my childhood abuse, this year was the first time I addressed it but I never got to complete it fully as nhs only do 8 sessions. At that point I thought I was getting better as i was about to start a new job and felt ok so i didnt follow it up privately and I know I still need to. As im only 2 months into my new job and the depression and axiety is getting the better of me again. I have been trying to hide from it and keep busy and find milestones to look forward to but right now that dont seem to be working.
I could go on and maybe i will another time.

I hope to find support here and give support too.

[Stormsky]

Hi
Depression does have a way of creeping up on you...
Couple years ago I gave up work due to feeling I just couldn't cope with anything..but was worst decision, being home every day when your depressed is not wise... At least work made me feel worth while and distracted me.., at home alone, no money etc, I was wallowing in more depressive thoughts..feeling worthless...
I guess what I'm saying is try to persevere with work, after 2 months you prob in trial period still? And from experience you don't want to be jobless at home alone... Took me nearly a year to find another job too, they're hard to come by.