Hi All
Well Im back to being a wreck like I was when I was 15.
My panic attacks first started when I was 15, I would get the violent shakes, palpitations, nausea, dry mouth and feel like sitting in the corner crying.
I felt like I was living under a doom cloud for about a month, I was put on tamazipan and propanalol and it was a horrid experience and didnt really help much.
I became reclusive, didnt want to leave my home and the safety of my little bubble and it took me almost a month before I would brave leaving my house.
Now fast forward 14 years - I had learnt to cope with them, to know the tell tale signs and stop it before it started.....Fight Or Flight wasnt an option......I have a loving partner and 2 beautiful children and I felt happy.
Until April/ May when I suddenly became light headed in work, and felt like I was going to faint. I came home went straight to bed and woke up with a blocked nose and feelign rough so I put it down to a bug, then a week latre when I returned to work it happened again......I went and saw the doctor and he said it sounded like pure anxiety, then weirdly once I knew what it was i was dealing with I didnt have them again, until the 27th July......
I went to my friends house which is about 1hr away by train - went there fine, and she confided that she really wasnt looking forward to the show and neither was I but we were due to meet our other friend so we had to go. was fine at her house, got ready and left for Bristol. Fine all the way there, got into the football stadium and it started filling up........BAM huge panic attack, so I saw two support acts and left before any of the main groups , 20 minutes down the road, chatting with my best friend and some breathign exercises later - felt fine.
........since then I have had 4 panic attacks - the 27th July, the 1st August which was in work but I managed to subside it just after being removed from the tills and put into work, 3rd August at home watching Harry Potter with my kids when they suddenly crowded me so I think that may have triggered it and yesterday which was horrile because it came out of the blue from no where
Ive been fine today too but I am aware that whilst I think I have just talked myself through symptoms of the start of an attack - weak arms and nausea I am aware that I am suddenly really tired and could literally sleep......I seem to have this feeling after every attack
I went to see the doctor this morning too and he is going to do some blood tests for me, one is for glucose, electrolytes, liver, and a fasting blood count too so I have to go for those monday and I am hoping that will give some answers but nothing too nasty.
Right think I will go and have a snooze - I have 4hr shift in work tonight and right now Im tired.
Hope your all feeling well today
x x x x x
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