Hi all,
I been meaning to write this for a while now...but life has been busy!!...
So I've been a member of this site for a few years now. When I first joined I was a chronically depressed teenager who was stuck in that vicious cycle that we all hate so much. My depression was triggered when my grandma died (I was 15)....she was like a mother to me as my own mum had severe depression after my dad died (when I was nine). So never mind the normal teenage hormones, I had lots of horrible grief emotions to deal with and I was pretty much alone.
So I was a self harmer, suicidal, and generally messed up. Spent a stint in the local psych hospital and tried god knows what therapies and medications.
I made a new start and moved away from home when I was 18...so I thought. But the depression followed with all the thoughts and messed upness. 2 bad relationships later and lots of random jobs I found myself in a stable relationship and a stable job (4 years ago). I finally made the decision to do something with my life....so I applied for uni...to be a nurse.
During my training I've had my ups and downs....and meltdowns. But I found support from uni, my partner, and I finally started doing well in therapy. I completed a 12 week CBT course through mind which helped a lot in fighting off the depressive thoughts and emotions.
So here I am, I have just finished uni (I am awaiting my nursing registration), and I have a job ready to start. I am a lot stronger, wiser, and more equipped to be a nurse with what I have been through, and I don't think I would change anything for the world. Yes I had a 10year wobble, but I made some great friends through here (you know who you are), and it's lead me to my partner who is my rock.
I will always have blips, and I am not completely cured. But I have the tools and strength to make the blips shorter, and am able to live my life. My "illness" is part of who I am and I hope people read this thread thinking...well there is hope. If I can get out of the hole...anyone can. I have been right at the bottom, but I have come through the other end proving it is possible. Keep thinking positive, keep swimming, and never give up.
I'm gona put it out there as well and say....I'm proud of myself....I've achieved so much and worked so hard to get where I am, I now deserve to live my life and do wonderful things with it!
Jac