Desperately want to write novel, but i feel held back by my mind

[JCRyanDenton]

I can't write for longer than a few lines at once. I am trying to write an epic novel about an ordinary man being chosen to save the world from an insane alien who wishes to simply kill all life he can come across. I am writing the fourth chapter first since its the chapter i have the most ideas for and i think i will be comfortable doing it out of order (going back and revising chapters when i think the plot has changed too much in other chapters) But yesterday i drank some beer and it made me slightly drunk (i was still thinking straight, but my inhibitors were lowered and my motor skills were a little dulled), working on the script wasn't too hard for me at that moment, but i only did a page's worth at least. I tried writing more today after getting some advice from a writing forum (sadly i rarely get a chance to talk to people about my work, its why i want more social support to see if it will help me motivation), but its going too slowly. I have been thinking of this idea since at least 2010 but i have been dying to get it done since. Only the other day i started writing this novel version of it (originally a crappy fanfiction esc story i did in 2009, then an unfinished screenplay, now trying to be a proper novel level story) and i have only done 11 or so pages.

Ugh, i feel tired and drained right about now. I haven't been truly happy in the past two days either with none of the chemicals that is induced by happiness being introduced into my body. Life is getting too boring and i still feel like a baby right now despite being 17.

[theharvestmouse]

Wouldn't advise to drink to try to feel happier, it's very shortlived and alcohol is a depressant. In regards to your novel, maybe if you do something like going for a walk or going somewhere that might give your mind the space to think. Sometimes it's difficult to get any creativity when you are sat staring at a blank page.

Remember that even the best authors get days when they struggle to write so don't get disheartened.

[Rennie1989]

I write novels so I can try and offer you some advice.

Firstly, you're too focused on the end product. Novels can be around 100,000 words, which is the equivalent of writing ten to five University dissertations! Break the novel down into sizable chunks. Focus on getting the odd scene/chapter written, then focus on the next one and so on. If you focus on those chunks you don't feel deflated by the idea of the WHOLE project.

If you have days that you cannot write your novel, maybe because of 'Writer's Block' then write something else. I've succumbed to WB and it's a massive pain in the derriere. You simply just have to write ANYTHING. When I have moments where I can't write my novel I write something else, an article for a blog, a letter to myself, anything. Once you get back into the flow you can continue writing again.

If you have any questions then feel free to ask. I've been writing for 10 years so I know a few tricks of the trade.

[Speranza]

Setting out to 'write an epic novel' is a huge pressure. Just write to enjoy it.

[Rennie1989]

^^^ (above)

That's the golden rule of novel writing

[NoPoet]

Rennie, if it's ok I'd like to PM you as I am also wanting to be an author.

JCRyanDenton, here is my advice to you:

1. Find out WHAT is important to you.
What makes your pulse race, what makes you happy or angry, things you have strong opinions about, anything that provokes an emotional response. These are the things you should write about. Disguise them in fiction, play out your hopes and fears through your characters and events. If you aren't writing about these things, you'll suffer far more from writer's block, boredom and frustration.

2. Think about your ultimate objective.
Are you aiming to be a published author? Do you just want to get the damn thing written? A missile isn't much use unless it's locked on to a target. That way, if it goes off course, it can correct itself.

3. Write a plan!
What events do you want in your novel? What scenes, characters, dialogue? Every time something occurs, make sure you have scrap paper to hand to jot it down. You can gradually draw this into a list of events - the framework of your novel. Then all you need to do is flesh out the scenes. Some people can write a cohesive novel without an overall plan, but you already stated you're having problems writing that way. This guide can be subject to constant change and you can always come and add new bits to it and take crap ones out.

NOTE: Is your synopsis a pain in the arse to write? That's because you should do it at the end after the novel is written. Most newbies, including me, probably do the synopsis first. A synopsis is a detailed run-through of the entire novel for the potential publisher to understand the novel without having to read through 257 pages of A4.

[suki300]

Thank yourself you are not me. I write for a job (self employed) and I have to get a certain amount of work done ideally by 5pm each week today, or Tuesday by the latest.

Every week it's the same, I have huge amounts of self doubt, I spend ages wasting time, procrastinating, coming on here etc. But if I don't do it, I could lose that work and that means a loss of income.

Take this week, I have done just over a quarter of what I'm supposed to do, but it's taken me all day, when if I put my mind to it and was in the right frame of mind, I could achieve so much more and probably get it all done in before 5pm. But it rarely happens, which is a shame because i could be doing other things and going to bed tonight with a weight off my mind.

Sometimes, I'm more productive if I stay up all night and I end up on a bit of a roll, but that isn't good for you.

Each Monday comes and I dread it. I don't know how I get through those two days, but it's not without tons of dread, self doubt and a serious sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach.

It's not even like it's a terrible job, I just don't have much confidence in myself and I'm very good at procrastinating.

[Speranza]

I think most of us are deadline people. I still remember an essay I once did at Uni - back in the days of typewriters, when if you made a mistake on an important document, you had to retype the whole page.

I had a packet of Hobnobs and several coffees, finally got to my desk and then realised I really OUGHT to tidy my room...

I finished the essay at 3.30am. The day before it was due in. WHY????

[suki300]

I think you are right Sperenza - sometimes, I'm glad I didn't go to uni, it just would have been more nights in my life doing the same thing.

Doing what you were doing - the hobnobs and the coffee and wondering why I didn't do it earlier.

I guess if I decided to write a novel and this is where I admire our op, because he's got so much further than I ever could. It would be such a difficult thing to do and I don't think he should underestimate the fact that most of the population wouldn't get to where he had. Most of us only keep that idea in our heads - actually attempting it is very admirable.

I guess a big task really needs breaking down into smaller ones, otherwise it is a mammoth enterprise.