Sooo very worried

[selphie]

I think i may have colon cancer and its eating me up with fear. I cant resume with a normal life at the moment.

For 9 years i have had episodes of bleeding from back passage. Starts at night with bad stomach cramps needing to go to the toilet when i finally do try to go back to sleep plagued with more stomach cramps then find only blood comes out. This goes on for a day then it goes away.

The last time i had this was may and before that episode it was two years. I have this now for 9 years and had 4 attacks the same way.

I had a rigid sigmoidoscopy that just showed up piles, and this is what they believed it was.

I was supposed to be having a sigmoidoscopy friday but cancelled because of my anxiety, I have been being sick and not sleeping with fear of what they may find.

I know it was stupid, but i just could not go through with it, I am so worried i am dying with cancer and i do not know what to do, I feel so alone and so very scared.

Please somebody give me some advice to what they think i may have

[nomorepanic]

We can't tell you what you have but I get bleeding with piles and with diverticular disease. I also have Crohn's disease.

You really need to get the test done to be honest or you will never know.

[Andria24]

Agree with above post - get the checks done. Your anxiety won't be helping and you know, 9 years is a long time to have an untreated disease as serious as that one without succumbing to it. Put your mind at rest. Bleeding piles and/or anal fissures are horribly common. It's ok to be scared Selphie.

[Fishmanpa]

One thing no one here can do is diagnose you.

What's worse... getting the test or worrying about being sick?

Chances are, if you've had this issue for nine years, it's not as serious as you believe. That being said, if there's a way to help you and make you feel better, isn't it worth a shot?

Good Luck!

[tracieann]

please get yourself checked out its just torment letting this go on and on i was scared like you but i went ahead and had my tests i havent had my results yet and feel scared about it but no more scared than ignoring the symptoms it can turn out to be nothing but you will never know or be treated for it if you dont go i wish you strength and peace

[selphie]

I feel like a failure and a embarrassment to everyone. I am a 37 year old female and i am acting like a child. My 9 year old acts more braver than me, I know i should have the test done, but i am so scared of what they're going to find.

I feel like i have left it far to long. What happens if its to late for me, and i have left things way to long.

I want to say its something else, but bottom line i am just a coward, Always have been.

I have been googling and i just think its cancer.... I spoke to the doctor today and she was not very reassuring

I really do not know whats worse... all i am thinking is fear, and i have been crying, I feel like a child, but i cant help it.

I know i need to the test, but i think then i have to rush and vomit, before i had this attack in may it was gone for 2 years and then attacked out of nowhere. There was more blood the last attack as well, the first attack was bright red and not much, and now its darker and more.... I am beside myself with worry. X

[nomorepanic]

If and this is a BIG IF it is something serious then best to get it treated now - the longer you leave the things the worse they get.

I am suspecting it could be just piles and/or a fissure but like I said diverticular disease can cause bleeding as well.

You have to know for sure though so bite the bullet and get it looked at.

[Suziqs]

Please do not feel that you are alone in this many people have the fear of Cancer and even though some are right to fear it those of us that fear it without consultation tend to be the ones that don't have it.

I was the same as yourself, not bleeding as such, but incontinent from my back passage with absolutely no warning at all. The last time it happened I was at work and yes had to come straight home completely embarrassed and scared stupid. My work mate (my best friend) was not having any of my protests and phoned my GP straight away saying it was at least the 4th time this had happened in 6 months - I saw the GP that afternoon, 3 days later I was in front of the Renal Consultant and 4 days later having a Barium X-Ray which was followed a week later by a Magic Eye.

Now dont get me wrong, the service was absolutely remarkable by the Consultant and Hospital but it didnt take away my fears or anxiety which created the most evil panic attacks.

What did relieve me was when I was phoned by the Hospital and told that I didn't have any Cancer whatsoever. I do have Divaticulitis and am now on Lopermide daily to counteract the same and that works for me.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE SEE PHONE YOUR GP TOMORROW - PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

---------- Post added at 22:36 ---------- Previous post was at 22:25 ----------

I feel like a failure and a embarrassment to everyone. I am a 37 year old female and i am acting like a child. My 9 year old acts more braver than me, I know i should have the test done, but i am so scared of what they're going to find.

I feel like i have left it far to long. What happens if its to late for me, and i have left things way to long.

I want to say its something else, but bottom line i am just a coward, Always have been.

I have been googling and i just think its cancer.... I spoke to the doctor today and she was not very reassuring

I really do not know whats worse... all i am thinking is fear, and i have been crying, I feel like a child, but i cant help it.

I know i need to the test, but i think then i have to rush and vomit, before i had this attack in may it was gone for 2 years and then attacked out of nowhere. There was more blood the last attack as well, the first attack was bright red and not much, and now its darker and more.... I am beside myself with worry. X

One more thing I didn't say was yes it had happened 4 times in 6 months that my friend knew about, but my son is 22 and had been happening intermittently since he was born - so please for your own sanity go see your GP and insist they send you to a Consultant to get you checked out again - if its piles they will sort them and anything else they find to be honest but they cannot sort something out unless they know about it - end of the day your 9 year old NEEDS YOU if you can't do it for yourself then do it for your child XxX BIG HUGS HUN

[selphie]

I have 5 children the youngest is 2..... I felt really bad when he came and cuddled me tonight, since a few weeks ago i have not been able to function, and spend time with them, because fear has taken over my daily life.

I am frightened about what they may find. I thought it was piles, but because i have such bad stomach cramps I know it has to be something more, It always comes in the same way the episodes are the same very bad stomach cramps continuous throughout the day and just needing to go a loo but passing blood, and i do not mean drops either, but the rest of the time i am absolutely fine.

I really just need to find the courage, I hope i can find it soon, because the worrying is killing me XXX

[nomorepanic]

Have you had blood tests?