the bottom fell out of rock bottom...

[Icequeen]

absolutely dreadful :(

on 30mg and the doctor seemed to think i was ok, well truth be told on the day i went to her i was ok... but my crashes are pretty big, and more often than i would imagine they should be... nearly 11 weeks into this med's. i thought i was at rock bottom, and climbing up, i knew id probably fall again, thats how it goes isnt it, but ive fallen back to rock bottom and beyond, in fact it goes even deeper, like the bottom fell out of rock bottom and theres a whole new world down there thats even darker than where i was before, there isnt even a glimmer of light or hope there, im totally numb and completely scared over what to do.. or whats going on... or whats going to happen...


i hit a crash last friday, came back up a bit monday but then yesterday hit again, sparked mainly by the fact i had a row with my fella and pretty sure we are done...


im heart broken, and feeling a total wreck today, i can't see how i can keep going... i can't see how i can do anything,,. ive come to work but i feel in a dream sort of state, im not really here, the world and people are moving, but i cant, i feel in a coma sort of state, i feel numb, im all out of tears and physically cannot cry which is frustrating, i cant speak, and can barely move let alone breathe or function...

i just dont know what to do...

do i ring my doctor? do i maybe need a higher dose? can i ask for a higher dose or do i have to go by what the doctor says, shes the expert after all?

i want and need help, and i want help now, i want to feel better and i want to feel better now... i'm numb, i'm tired and i hurt

what can i do...?

[MrAndy]

Hello Icequeen i think what you should do is call the doctor,it sounds like what you really need is someone to talk to.Upping a dose wont help shorterm and from my experience doesnt make a massive difference long term.Try and find sombody to confide in if at all possible.
good luck

[jenny kilden]

Hi ice x
Ah my lovely sounds like your having a tough time, but through it all you still manage to get up and go to work , that's a huge achievement !

Ring your doctor and see if you can talk to them, I don't think upping your dose will do much, other than give more side effects.
You'll get through this blip, there is a light it's just really hard to see at the moment.

Pm me if you want to chat.
I've just been reading an online cbt course which is good x
Your doing brill even tho you don't think it, your carrying in regardless and that's huge!!
Big hugs x