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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    364

    Who fancies being my flux diary buddy?

    Hi everyone

    Thanks for opening the thread and reading.

    I'll introduce myself, I'm Julie, married with 2 children. I was diagnosed with a GAD a few months back, October time. It was just before a holiday and I was anxious about everything and anything ... it was just ridiculous. I have a good GP and who would see me every other day and listen to my ramblings. At first I thought I had vertigo as I was feeling dizzy all the time and my brain/head felt funny ... like it was moving. Soooo, I was given Citolopram and within a few days I felt worse than ever and stopped taking them. I was given diazepam and that's how I got on with the holiday.. but I had to go back to visit my GP when I returned. I never went back, well, not for a few weeks. It's now middle of November and my GP refers me to the mental health team at the hospital as she is reluctant to give me any Anti D's as I've got such negative opinions over what happened with the Citalopram. Fast forward the hospital appointment and I prescribed Fluoxetine. By this time I was so poorly I was ready to take anything.

    So my journey starts 1st December, I am prescribed 20mg of Flux. The first night was dreadful, but I knew I would be bad and just kept telling myself it was a SE and that's it. Then I felt almost euphoric for a few days, again another SE, but that's a fab SE

    Then my son came to have an minor procedure in hospital and I felt really bad. Not depression, just my anxiety way out of control. It took about 4 days to calm down.

    Then came 30th Dec and I bite into a bacon sarnie and I have the most horrendous pain, next day I am at the dentist and getting the tooth taken out. It was a difficult extraction. But the fear I have been left with is immense.

    I feel like every tooth is going to give me toothache. I am shaking and not eating.

    I've still stuck with the Flux and don't want to stop, I've read lots of threads and I'm wondering if I have hit the blip that Flux users can get and bear in mind the tooth ache, it's taking me a bit longer to get over it.

    So ... I'm finding it over whelming to do most of the basic stuff, get the kids to school, making a meal, cleaning the house etc .. but I am forcing myself to do it. Apart from eating, I don't feel like eating at all, but then when I do eat, I eat my food like I am hungry.

    So today, I made myself do some ironing, it's been building up for a while and then I felt great that I had done something. But I want someone to talk too, I have no close friends and although my hubby is sympathetic he has no idea what I am going through as he is the most relaxed person ever and doesn't appear to have a nervous bone in his body - lucky him!

    So, who fancies sharing their flux journey with me. I will keep this like a diary style, so what I have done each day, how I am feeling etc and hopefully with sharing I will start with my recovery.

    And well done for getting to the end! Blame all the spelling mistakes on my shakey hands

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    364

    Re: Who fancies being my flux diary buddy?

    Day 36 of taking Flux

    Not had the best of days, but I made my first post on NMP so that's a positive. I did some ironing - another positive and I helped my youngest tidy his room. Negatives, only eaten 2 bananas and drank brews all day. Couldn't face cooking so sent hubby out of a take out. The outlaws (inlaws) turned up and felt quite anxious whilst they where here as I just wanted to sit down and try and relax.

    My gum is still sore where my tooth was extracted and I'm jaw clenching so I'm proper fed up with all that. Feel quite anxious and shaky but it will be bed time soon. Just taken a sleepease tab, I can only take one tab, the recommended dose is two tabs but two knock me out way to quickly.

    Here's hoping for a better day tomorrow.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Posts
    213

    Re: Who fancies being my flux diary buddy?

    It took me around 70 days to start feeling sort of back to my old self. I was a mess. Daily writing on here helped me a lot, as did keeping busy. You WILL get through this, but it may take a while. I hope your breakthrough is soon, I'm interested to read how your journey goes.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    364

    Re: Who fancies being my flux diary buddy?

    Thanks Big, hopefully I will start to feel better soon.

    So... I got my days mixed up, I am actually Day 39

    Day 39

    Got kids to school, which is a massive achievement. Came home and I felt tired so went back to bed. Woke up feeling much more positive about lunch time. Did some housework, actually, quite a bit of housework compared to what I haven't done these past few weeks . Still not feeling hungry, even though my tummy is growling at me. But I've had a banana, some choccie biccies and some grapes. Picked kids up from school and went to shop - now that is massive! Bet it was Christmas when I last went into a shop. Bought some crumpets to have later before bed. I've prepared tea for hubby and kids but hubby is cooking it when he comes in. I'm going for a bath now and then later I'm having reflexology.

    So today, woke up feeling all anx, prickly skin, no appetite, but not feeling shaky like I was yesterday. Felt great chatting to other mums at school which was nice too. No over thinking either today too.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    96

    Re: Who fancies being my flux diary buddy?

    Good posts I'm the same

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    364

    Re: Who fancies being my flux diary buddy?

    Hi Claire

    Thanks for posting.

    Just had my reflexology, I've eaten a crumpet and decided I am phoning the dentist tomorrow. I've got a chipped tooth at the back and although it's not causing me any pain, I am convinced it is going to start soon ... so, I've made an executive decision to phone the dentist and get him to sort it out, then that's one less worry .... sure I'll find something else to worry about though

    Just taken a sleepease tablet so it won't be long before I will be taking my sorry bum to bed.

    Here's to a better day tomorrow!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    364

    Re: Who fancies being my flux diary buddy?

    Day 40

    Had the worst night sleep ever! Didn't sleep a wink, anxiety through the roof and my skin feels like it's crawling. Hubby took kids to school whilst I phoned the Docs, got an appointment straight away. I was prescribed Propranalol 10mgs 3 times a day. Came home and took a tablet straight away. Oh my days!! The relief was instant. Felt so much calmer and relaxed. Went back to bed but didn't sleep, just relaxed. Right now I am waiting for my tea to cook, first time in days I have felt hungry and I can't believe how hungry I am feeling .

    I'm hoping I sleep well tonight, I could really do with a good night sleep.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Posts
    1,071

    Re: Who fancies being my flux diary buddy?

    I had to have propranolol as well and am still on it, my doctor gave me a slow release version and I had an 80 mg one to start with and then had to up it to 160mg when the side effects got worse, I just have to take one tablet a day which is good and they do help.

    J

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    364

    Re: Who fancies being my flux diary buddy?

    Thanks Janine

    I was so worried at the docs, that I would end up being sent to hospital. I'd never heard of Propranolol until a couple of days ago but I had no idea what it was for. It worked a treat for me today. To have my skin feel normal has been fantastic. And, I have eaten pizza for my tea!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    364

    Re: Who fancies being my flux diary buddy?

    Day 41

    Not really slept again, but managed to stay in bed till about 10am Got up and had a shower, not feeling as anxious as yesterday which is brilliant, but I do have some anxiety, I'm slightly shaking. Take my Flux and go and get showered and ready for the day. Then I take a Propranolol. Feel quite calm and hungry around lunch time so I have a fish from the chip shop Spent most of the afternoon just doing little bits around the house, like washing and drying. But I spent most of the time reading. I do feel quite relaxed but not hungry. Going to chill with my hubby and kids tonight just watching tv. Going to try and early night but even though I'm not sleeping, I just don't feel tired. But I've loved my lazy day today. I think being kind to myself helps me. If I don't put to many demands on my myself I can cope with the day better.

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