Motivation for flooding needed

[Kate408]

Hi.
I need some help. I'm afraid I haven't been on here for a long time, but I'm asking for your help please.
I fear my panics so badly that I am not able to be on my own at all. To the point that my poor husband can't even go to the toilet in a public place and every time he goes to work he has to drop me at someone's house on his way to work and pick me up at the end of the day. this sometimes means a 2 and a half hour journey for him before and after a full day's work :-(
I desperately want to get better but it is so scary. I am with my mum today and she wants to help, but we just tried her driving to the post box up the road (less than 2 minutes it would have been), but I was so scared before they went that I just couldn't let them go.
I am wondering about doing flooding/immersion therapy.
I have been considering it for a while and I am getting really desperate now, I think it is the only way I am going to get truly better. I have tried graded exposure and just get to a point where I can't do anymore.
My fear is that I will panic. I'm pretty sure that I don't worry about dying anymore.
Despite my earlier failure, I am wondering about distracting myself in a shop while my mum drives off and then I will have to walk back to hers (about a 20 minute walk uphill). I will surely panic but I will see that it does stop and that I can physically walk back here afterwards.
Any advice would be much appreciated.
I hope to do it later today.
Kate

[jackie13]

Hi hun

Sorry to hear that you are struggling?

I used to be exactly the same but then I thought "maybe nothing will happen". So I tried a little bit at a time. You know what, nothing ever did happen. I panicked but kept talking little steps each day and the panic decreased.

Nothing will happen Hun it never does, it's fear that keeps us in this loop.

Why not have a go? You may feel rubbish during and after, but nothing will happen.

Luv & hugs
Jackie xx

[Kate408]

Thanks Jackie. I have told myself if I do it that I can buy myself some news clothes (that's the distraction while my mum drives off). Lots of people don't like the idea of flooding, but the thing with panic is that we never sink.
I am terrified of doing it, but I am so desperate to get better.I want to be at home so I can be a good wife and mother rather than being such a burden to everyone around me. I will feel such a sense of achievement if I do it. And I'll be able to get some new clothes!
But....I will probably chicken out like I always do :-(

[Annie0904]

Kate I think you may find this online course helpful http://ct-online-info.com/wp-login.p...om%2F&reauth=1

[Kate408]

(Thinking "aloud")
If I do it, I will have such a sense of achievement afterwards.
My husband will be really pleased.
I might not fear it as much next time.
I will prove to myself that the panic will go.
Maybe I won't need to do it again. Maybe that will be enough to stop me fearing it?
Aaaagggghhhhh...... it is so hard!!!!!!!
If I do it, it will be about 4.45/5pm ish.
Kate

---------- Post added at 16:00 ---------- Previous post was at 15:56 ----------

Thanks Annie. What is the course about? I have previously tried CBT and I didn't get very far.
My current therapist (I'm not sure of her title... I think she is a CPN) is pressuring me to do graded exposure, but we have been doing it for ages now and I have made no progress. If anything, I seem to be getting worse. She also thinks that you shouldn't distract yourself or use techniques because at the end of the day, panic isn't dangerous.

[Annie0904]

It is cbt but has lots of very good exposure advise. It really helped in my recovery. It is free for NMP members.

[Kate408]

I tend to agree with her in some ways. If I used techniques, I would stress myself out by being so dependant on the techniques.

---------- Post added at 16:04 ---------- Previous post was at 16:02 ----------

Thanks Annie. I will have a look later. We have to go out in a minute (mum has an appointment), but whether or not I do the exposure, I will look into that link.

---------- Post added at 19:15 ---------- Previous post was at 16:04 ----------

I didn't manage to do the flooding exposure. :-(
Feeling quite demoralised.
Even my 2 and a half year old keeps saying that she wants to get me better. I know she doesn't realise what is wrong, and has just heard people saying it, but still!

[Kate408]

Hi everyone. Thanks for your messages. I did finally do the flooding I had been planning, and to my surprise I didn't panic! :-)
It does mean that I still fear panicking, but I felt so great after I did it!

[graham58]

Fantastic! Every time someone takes on a challenge like this, succeeds and writes about it here. it gives hope to others who are or may be struggling with the same thing.

[thegirlwithanxiety]

Hi everyone. Thanks for your messages. I did finally do the flooding I had been planning, and to my surprise I didn't panic! :-)
It does mean that I still fear panicking, but I felt so great after I did it!

Hi Kate, the past few years i’ve struggled with panic attacks and just overthinking about everything, so proud of you for getting out your comfort zone i know how difficult it can be but you need to be proud of yourself for the little things i know our brains go straight to anything bad that’s happened but you’re doing so well stay strong


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