How low can I go?

[keepemlaughing]

Hi all,
I am writing from work this morning feeling very low and insecure again. When I last wrote I was having a few problems with my medicine. My doctor told me to stop taking it as of last week. Since that time I have cried so many times throughout each day. My little ones are sick of me and have every right to be. I feel so insecure and desparate for anything that will lift this horrible depression. I am 50 lbs overweight so last week I cut out all sodas. At this very moment I am munching on pineapple wedges. But my pants are still too tight and I swear one leg appears to be longer than the other. I will be so glad when this semester is over. I work at the same college I go to school at. I got my AA degree this summer, so taking additional classes at this time was so silly. I knew I didn't feel good, so why put that much more pressure on myself. Last night we didn't even go to church.....I was just too worn out. And even though I slept pretty good, thank you Seroquel, I still hit the snooze button four times and then had to rush all morning getting the three granddaughters ready for school and me ready for work. Someone always doesn't like what I have picked for them to wear, or has a million tangles in their hair, or can't find their shoes......I resorted to tears.....what a failure. I cannot wait until my follow up appointment with the doc next week. PLLLLLEASE find the right medicine for my depression. I just feel down. I need some encouragement. Please do not hate me for posting this under more than one heading. I am desparate for some feedback.
Thank you.

Sheryl

[mirry]

Hi Sherly, U must go and see your doctor again and get further help,
you say your not happy with your weight but what else is bothering you ?

You sound like your leading a very busy life, are you taking time for yourself ? To relax and do some hobbies ?
Do you have good friends or family ? Do they know how you are feeling?

Depression usually comes about because you have feelings of loss of control about something , try and think what things you feel you have lost control about .

I hope you feel better soon.

mirryx

[keepemlaughing]

No, Mirry...i get absolutely no time to myself. Yes, this is part of the problem. I am so anxious to see my doctor next week. I guess I am very foolishly still hoping that there is a super pill out there somewhere that will "cure" my depression.
Thank you so much for responding. Just knowing someone cared enough to respond means the world to me. I feel like I am sitting here at work in this alien world and my only link to sanity is this web site. How ridiculous is that?

Sheryl

[Helenas2]

Sheryl Hi
I dont know if I can be of much help - I have just recently come off 3 years off antidepressants, the experience had been a rollercoaster, for the first week i cried everyday had severe panic attacks, the second week it got a little easier still cried but just kept pushing myself vowing i would not take them again. its been a month i cry less now, i still have dizzy sicky spells and panic attacks - but i am so proud that i am clean.
Only come off when the time is right for you and only come off under your gps guidance. You sound like you have a handful to deal with, really try and make some time for you- even if its a bath in the evening with some lavender oils and a candle - look after yourself and most of all - belive in yourself xxx

[keepemlaughing]

Thank you so much Helena. I actually teared up when you said "just believe in You". Thank you. I will try very hard to get some Me time this weekend. It will be difficult, and I usually feel so guilty after the kids are gone for wanting them gone in the first place, but I am making a vow to myself at this moment to just do it.

Thank you sweetie.

Sheryl

[yorkylover]

Sorry to hear your having bad time Sheryl,I think you need to go back to your doctor to pet.Take care

Ellen XX

[Helenas2]

hi sheryl
hope you are feeling slightly better - when i first found this website - I felt relieved that there where people out the that understood me and I could relate to.
I hope you are finding the time this weekend to pamper yourself and have some time off from the crazy old world x let us know how you get on xx