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Thread: Partner with social anxiety affecting son?

  1. #1

    Partner with social anxiety affecting son?

    Hi my partner and father of my son has social anxiety and depression. It's been going on since school age and he has no qualifications as he stopped going to school. He's 20 now and since then has gone out a handful of times. We got pregnant with my son by accident really although he's the best thing that ever happened to me!

    The complications of my partners condition seemed to get worse when we had my son. My son was born 2 months early and was extremely small for gestation (2lb11oz) I was very proud of my partner as he came to the birth and when my son was in hospital he managed to visit twice a week. My son has had a lot of weight gain issues, development and health issues. He has been in hospital 3. Times this winter with lung issues that started as a cold. As you can imagine this has taken its toll on us and as my partner doesn't go out I'm left to work do the shopping etc I do the housework as we'll and other than when I work look after my son.

    My partner is quite angry and stuck in his own world of feeling sorry for himself I think. I have to fight to get him in the bath once a month even then it's me washing him. Everyone else views him as lazy but I can understand depression and that it's hard to do what seems simple to others if you're that down.

    I might sound selfish but my son is 15 months now and very attached to me! He should hopefully be walking soon and I'm concerned as he gets older he will want daddy to take him to the park while I'm working and dad won't be able to go. I'm worried about my son losing out because of social anxiety . I'm worried about how low my partner is sinking. I want to help but he has already refused professional help and doesn't confide in anyone on how he feels. Any advice would be appreciated

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Posts
    289

    Re: Partner with social anxiety affecting son?

    Hi Worriedpartner I really think you will need to get some professional help for your partner or talk to a doctor yourself for advise on this. I found it hard to own up that I needed help ( its a bloke thing I think ) and still keep my problems to only people I'm close to. Perhaps if you spoke to him about how you feel and how its affecting your family, there is help out there and I found my doctor easy to talk to.
    I don't feel ready to do cbt but the tablets the doctor gave me really are helping. Would he be willing to chat to people on here as he would gets loads of support from this site as will you from people in the same boat one way or another .

    Ray

  3. #3

    Re: Partner with social anxiety affecting son?

    I know how you must be feeling and I sympathise with you and your partner. My son has suffered with social anxiety and depression for a number of years, he is 26 years old and I constantly worry about him. Until recently I was the only person he confided in. Eventually I got him to go to the doctors and he is now on meds. He can still get very low. You must be feeling lonely too. Get him to the doctors and keep communicating. Hope you get some respite and help for your partner. Feel for him and you.

  4. #4

    Re: Partner with social anxiety affecting son?

    hi,I from suffer depression aswell....it must be very,very difficult for you to cope you must be a really strong caring person.I am surprised you have stuck by him because most people don't understand depression and will quickly walk away.It sounds like he is in a very bad way and I think the best thing you can do for yourself and for him is to seek professional help very soon or your situation is not going to improve any and may even worsen.I wish you all the best and hope your future improves for yourself and your family.

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