Hi, I used to post on here a few years back but have been better over the last couple of years. Last year I was pregnant and that got my mind off my health anxiety. Since having the baby 6 months ago though the health anxiety is back in full force. I think it comes back every time something good happens in my life, like my brain fears that everything will suddenly go wrong. I will also say that I had post natal depression/anxiety pretty bad until about 2 months ago.

The current fear is about either pancreatic cancer or some other form of lymphoma or something in my abdomen. I have had loose stools since having the baby and then I started noticing that I was burping a lot and had indigestion burning type pain on and off after eating or after drinking water. Six weeks ago I went on holiday and finally felt anxiety free regarding the baby, but 2 days into the holiday the burning in my upper abdomen became permanent. I took rennies and every other type of acid inhibitor (including prescription stuff) and nothing helped it. It also then turned into a gnawing ache permanently there day and night. I had a colonoscopy and endoscopy done and nothing was found (I expected he would find an ulcer or gastritis or something but secretly feared they would find stomach cancer). Once those tests were clear I started panicking about my pancreas. This is one of the cancers which absolutely terrifies me. I had an ultrasound and bloods done. My liver and pancreas bloods were fine as was normal blood counts etc. and the scan showed all normal. However (and I know how stupid this sounds) the scan took only 5 minutes, it seemed just too quick to get a good look!

So I went to another GP in true health anxious fashion and have had another lot of bloods done, and having another ultrasound done on the weekend. The pain is also now burning in my back and I'm absolutely terrified they missed something - either in my pancreas or lumps or something in the abdominal area under my ribs.

I just can't shake the thought that it's something terrible as my mind is thinking how can I feel all these symptoms and it be nothing?! Can anxiety really cause all these things? I am seeing a psychologist because of the post natal stuff, but I'm going to talk to her about the health anxiety too. However I just feel I need to get these tests done and get the all clear before I can even fathom being physically ok!

I certainly didn't miss this health anxiety thing the last couple of years!

I guess my fear is that I don't want to put these things down to anxiety and miss something...