2 wks 15mg and over 2 wks at 30mg for depression 😞

[mummyanxious]

But surely if his mood is low then that can make you feel depressed? It's not our personalities that are depressed, its our mood being low that leads to depression?

---------- Post added at 16:27 ---------- Previous post was at 16:25 ----------

And isn't that the thing? I keep reading what you and keggsy have put and while you both say you've had a small amount if improvement I keep seeing you both say you're not sure you're feeling much better and you've both been on them quite a substantial amount if time? I'm not criticising it anything, just looking from outside at posts you've both done and seeing how long you've both taken to feel better and both of you admit you don't feel *well*yet.

[xrachykinsx]

Well no, because I've been honest in admitting I have bad days...and we all know when you're having a bad day...it feels the end of the world. It's only when I look at how I've come along as a whole that I see I am getting better even if it's gradual. I don't understand what you mean mummy about saying 'surely if his mood is low'. I'm just stating a fact that it's your mood that is altered by meds not your personality. You still like the same things, you're still the same person. It's just you don't feel like doing things. I was depressed but I still liked dance music, sparkly things and butterflies lol... That's my personality and that never changed despite how poorly I was.

It's normal in recovery to doubt how you're doing. The fact I have had times I've doubted myself doesn't mean I'm actually going backwards.

[mummyanxious]

It's what you said here is what I meant

Do you not think it's the depression that's making you numb? Medication doesn't affect your personality, just your mood. I understand that some meds can numb your emotions slightly..but again, that's your mood not your personality.

But then I read back and he's saying his personality is awful. What I meant was its not his personality that's affected it's just low mood. But the meds can be contributing to lowering his mood. No his personality is still under there somewhere but at the moment his mood is altering the way he feels about himself. And actually I've felt more down in some respects since I started these meds/

Please rachy I'm not having a go at you at all, I'm just trying to work out for myself whether these meds are going to help me in the long run.

[xrachykinsx]

I don't really understand what you're trying to prove to me mummy I'm afraid. Yes the mood makes you lower but again that's not your personality, which is what I said... I'm not quite sure why you're trying to nit pick at my post. If anything I'm trying to reassure Chris that he meds don't affect your personality. I can't answer that question for you Hun, because you seem to be having a worse time on these meds than me.. And in all honesty...despite yeah having my moments...mirtazapine was deffo good for me in even the first week...I just went wobbly In between as I tried to get a grip of it all. You're only a few days in so it's really early days. Surprised it doesn't make you sleep either though like Keggsy...but we're all different x

[mummyanxious]

Sorry I've not got what I was trying to say across properly, there was no nit picking. I'll shut up. I didn't mean to offend anyone :(

[smithci]

Do you not think it's the depression that's making you numb? Medication doesn't affect your personality, just your mood. I understand that some meds can numb your emotions slightly..but again, that's your mood not your personality.

Mirtazapine is meant to be one of the most gentle drugs compared to SSRI types. I haven't felt particularly different on them. It's just my anxiety still pokes through frequently. I did have some mega bad days in early days of mirtazapine, and still have a bad day or 2 here and there but moping around the house expecting to feel completley cured wasn't going to help me so I've forced myself to go out, see friends etc and that's all been part of my recovery so far.

I think sometimes we all expect miracles from these drugs. I've kind of come to terms with the fact I'm not going to wake up happy every morning, and starting to accept that these drugs just stop me from going completely under so I can do the rest myself.. There's no denying...it's bloody hard at times, but you really have got to just hold on at least until 8weeks before deciding. Despite my bad days....I still wouldn't come off mirtazapine yet....I can't underestimate what they are actually doing...I was so bad before starting them xx

I don't think it's the depression making me numb.

Before I started medication I could cry but also in the evening I could enjoy the odd thing like a tv show or something .

I also had a sex drive!

Mirt is not helping with my appetite either. The sleep I'm getting is its only saving grace at the moment.

I know that pills aren't a miracle cure but I honestly think I am worse now. it's making therapy more difficult too due to motivation and apathy

[xrachykinsx]

All the things you're mentioning are very rare symptoms for mirtazapine. Especially the appetite thing as mirtazapine is given to people with eating disorders as it does build their weight up a bit usually- the doctor told me to be careful incase I get overweight! Lol

Perhaps you should try something else if it really has shown no positives at the moment. Perhaps going to the doctor and discussing these points. I would have thought you'd perhaps see some positive points after 4weeks. Your doc might want you to stay a bit longer until 6-8weeks but all the things you're experiencing are really rare with mirtazapine. It's usually prescribed for people that don't like the sexual side effects of other antidepressants.... So sorry you're not feeling any brighter at all Chris :/ I had hoped it would of worked for you- it was you I was speaking to on patient.co.uk wasn't it? Xx

[keggsy]

Were are all mates here and some of us struggle more than others at different times and in different ways.

We all speak from experience and only we truly know how we feel at any given time.

Mirt is pretty gentle so if we are suffering badly it may not be the best single med for us.

I know I'm better than 4 months ago, but not what I used to be due to engrained poor sleep habits.

Mirt will not cure me of that, maybe CBT will help or I have to accept and adjust that I have to live with it at the no.

[xrachykinsx]

Agreed Keggsy. We all suffer differently, at different times and we never ever truly know how one person feels compared to the others..we can only judge ourselves and I guess that's what makes medication a different experience for all of us. There is something out there to help all of us though... xx

[smithci]

Hi Rachael ..

Thanks Yes it's me the moaner! ��

The thing is I'm really stuck here .. I can't afford anymore time to switch to another med. My doctor is not very clued up on anti depressants.

The reason I asked for mirtazapine was because of the lack of side effects, sleep and it's supposedly rapid onset of action.

I think its the depression getting worse that is stopping me eating