driving me mad!

[quoakley]

Hi, Im here again in the same mental hell, as ive been on numerous occasions.My fear of harming someone by my mistakes, continues to blight my life and my families.I worry about causing accidents, on every journey I ever make in my car. I have suffered with this for best part of 25 years, at its worst it made me feel life was not worth living.I have learned to deal with these worries better than I used to, but life still seems such drudgery, and enjoyment is a thing of the past.Christmas is coming and I love the time of year but have not been happy at this time of year, since i started with the ocd.I feel very guilty about enjoying myself, when there are thoughts constantly in my mind about possibly having hurt someone,during my last car journey.
does anyone else relate to this?:(:(:(

[kate]

I mainly suffer with anxiety/depression but I think I have a bit of OCD added in there too [:I]

I too have thoughts that I have knocked someone down in my car. I have to pass 2 schools on the way to work and I'm always thinking that I have run a child over. I also have terrible worries of being responsible for other type of accidents happening. So many times I have worried that the fag ends that I have put in the bin aren't out and that I will start a fire that will spread to next doors property and kill or injure everyone.

I also worry that I haven't put the handbrake on my car and it will roll away and kill someone.

It's so horrible when life seems a chore not a pleasure. I can sympathise with you so much.

Are you receiving any councelling?

Kate x


"Everybody's changing and I don't feel the same"

[Piglet]

Oh my goodness - I totally relate to all of that, Kate and quoakley.

When I used to smoke years and years ago I always used to be checking and double checking that my cigarettes were out - to the point that I kept an old mug with water in it and used to put them in that if I was at home (I didn't think I suffered with anxiety in those days lol)!!

The driving thing is exactly the same with me (I can't afford to run a car these days so it's not so much an issue) I was always scared of 'what if I cause an accident' and of leaving the handbrake off and it rollin off.

I do totally indentify with you both and I never stop being amazed at how many times on here I think '[Wow!] me too'!!

Having said all that it is soooo important to realise that accidents can happen and obviously the majority of society do not deliberatly set out to do harm to other people. We live in a world where every situation must have someone to blame and you can get sued for anything you care to imagine. This is all very wrong!!

Yes indeed we must take every care that we are acting in a safe way to others but we need to remember what the word accident really means - 'an unintentional event'. Unintentional being such an important word here and the difference between deliberatly and knowingly wanting to do harm.

We have to allow for this in our lives because to do otherwise is just not possible or wise.

Love Piglet x



"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.

[kate]

Piglet,

I put my ciggies out in water too! [:I][:I][:I]

Kate x


"Everybody's changing and I don't feel the same"

[Piglet]

Scary isn't it hun, how we can all be so different, yet all be the same!!!

Piglet xx

"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.

[quoakley]

<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">I mainly suffer with anxiety/depression but I think I have a bit of OCD added in there too [:I]

I too have thoughts that I have knocked someone down in my car. I have to pass 2 schools on the way to work and I'm always thinking that I have run a child over. I also have terrible worries of being responsible for other type of accidents happening. So many times I have worried that the fag ends that I have put in the bin aren't out and that I will start a fire that will spread to next doors property and kill or injure everyone.

I also worry that I haven't put the handbrake on my car and it will roll away and kill someone.

It's so horrible when life seems a chore not a pleasure. I can sympathise with you so much.

Are you receiving any councelling?

Kate x


"Everybody's changing and I don't feel the same"

<div align="right">Originally posted by kate - 09 December 2006 : 16:44:36</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">

Hi Kate, and thankyou for taking the time to read and reply to me.The smoking thing bothers me too,I also put tabs out in an ashtray full of water, but still at times worry if I cant remember, having thrown it away afterwards.I really wish none of us suffered with this most debilitating of illnesses, but it is reasuring to hear from others that do have the same irrational thoughts.Thanks again for your response.Quoakley

[quoakley]

Hi to both of you again Im not used to replying to others posts, so ithink I got it wrong the first time. Hopefuly iI get it right this time. This one carries the same sentiment. Thanks to you both for responding, it has made me feel better, knowing that other people do care enough to reply and offer support.Kate, yes I have been receiving CBT councelling, but after making such good progress,i am no longer going on a monthly basis, but have another session scheduled for may next year.
Quoakley.

[quoakley]

Hi to both of you again Im not used to replying to others posts, so ithink I got it wrong the first time. Hopefuly iI get it right this time. This one carries the same sentiment. Thanks to you both for responding, it has made me feel better, knowing that other people do care enough to reply and offer support.Kate, yes I have been receiving CBT councelling, but after making such good progress,i am no longer going on a monthly basis, but have another session scheduled for may next year.
Quoakley.

[kate]

Aww it's a shame that you aren't having CBT at the moment, especially as it was helping you. Was this on the NHS, if you don't mind me asking?

Kate x


"Everybody's changing and I don't feel the same"

[quoakley]

I am happy that the visits are now less frequent as I am confident that the advise given has equiped me to deal with things more rationally.
I do have relapses and that is why I value so much, the moral support I have already received on this forum from the likes of yourself.
Many thanks,
Quoakley.