Why oh Why oh Why!

[PAULF]

Im really sorry to keep on moaning and moaning and moaning ......

I still cant get these ANTS out of my head, as i am typing this my mind is going in circles, tried to phone 2 of my mates @ dinner time who i just got back in contact with last weekend - they are not answering the phone - i got into a state about that, ie why are they not answering the phone.

My mate who is working is travelling (well she is probably closer than a mate but we are taking things slowly), im in a state about that, making sure she is ok travelling.

The weird thing is, i try and block these thoughts out and for a few minutes everything is fine and then it is back to anxiety again.

I go to the gym everynight - i am wondering now whether i should try and stay at home a couple of nights and chill but when i think about it, i dont think i could. Am i going to the gym everynight to avoid staying at home by myself in my bedroom - although ive lots of things i could do whilst i am at home.

Sorry to moan and probably go over old ground but its doing my head in!

The thing is, i know when i get home my friend who lives in blackpool will be home safely and my mates, well they are probably out. But their is always that "what if" thought.

How do i stop it:( Pls help.


Paul

[Laurie28]

Hiya Paul,

I get these thoughts (mainly about my kids) ie what if they get run down, what if (after the wee one has fell and banged his face/head/leg - yet again) he has concussion. what if what if what if!!!
I have to try and distract myself it is the only thing that works for me and admittedly - touch wood (madly tapping head!) since I have been 'getting better' i probably still get these thoughts but don't dwell on them.

I think going to the gym is great for you and certainkly helps anxiety/depression/panic but I do feel you need some time relaxing or doing other things.
Try renting a dvd (a feel good one!) and sitting back and relaxing
It works for me

I hope this made some sense Paul and I know how upsetting it is when you are constantly worrying about someone but i am sure she will phone and your mind will be put at ease

take care
lucky

[jo-jo]

Hiya Paul

I guess many of us here are familiar with the 'what if' thinking thing. Not sure whether this will be any good to you but my GP recommended an on-line CBT course to help deal with negative thoughts (in my case more related to what if I have a panic attack in public...). I haven't actually tried it myself as yet as my meds and acupuncture have helped me loads but the site is www.moodgym.anu.edu - might be worth a go.

Good luck, love Jo xxx

[Jules31]

Hi Paul

I think CBT is definitely the best thing for you, as it helps you learn to control the negative thinking. I tried to click on the link posted by Jo, but it wouldn't take me anywhere.

Maybe it might be worth asking your dr to refer you for CBT. I know it takes ages, so the sooner the better, unless you have health insurance or can pay privately.

Jules

[jo-jo]

Oops sorry folks I missed a bit off the end of the address.

Its www.moodgym.anu.edu.au

Love Jo xx

[sarah]

Hiya Paul

How are you feeling today?

I used to get the 'what if/why me' feelings constantly. Dwelling on every little thing that came into my mind until it drove me crazy.

I can only say that it started to go in time as I started to get better and find myself things to occupy my mind.

I also had CBT but I know the waiting list is long.
Have you thought of going for hypnotherapy? I was totally sceptical at first until a friend pursuaded me to give it a try and it truly was a lifesaver...worth a try????

take care
love Sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution

[PAULF]

Hi Sarah,

Im fine thank you. Went to the doctors on Wednesday. They told me that the anxiety and thoughts etc are probably due to the stress and life changes which i have had to go through in the last month (ie moving back home; working with an ex-girlfriend at work who doesnt even talk to me and makes life very hard, changes in my job role).

That sort of settled my mind as at first i didnt know what was the matter with me - thought i was going mad. I can now see light at the end of the tunnel, i havent had a drink since last saturday and feel a hell of a lot better for it - i seem to be able to control my thoughts better.

As for hypnotherapy and CBT, these are things which im going to think about, as i do feel alot stronger than i did and hopefully on the right road now. At first i thought i had no-one but i soon realised that i have alot of mates, including everyone at "no more panic". I just wish i had internet at home so i could chat to everyone in the chat room.

I used to go the gym every night, then realised that i never really spent time relaxing, playing on my playstation, playing the keyboard etc etc - tuesday night i stayed in and for the first time was completely relaxed!

So, hopefully things are gradually getting better.


Paul xx



Dont mean to bitch but it amazes me how my ex is treating me, but its a lesson learnt and now im not going to give her the time of day.

[Laurie28]

Hiya paul,

I'm glad you are finding time to relax.
There is nothing better than realizing you are not mad (for a while i really thought I was losing the plot ... big time)

I'm also glad about the cutting back on the alcohol as (i am sure u are aware) this isn't helping with your anxiety etc but worsening it. my fear is also that people become to reliant on alcohol for confidence etc and then find themselves with an alcohol problem which in my opinion is a whole new league!!!!

Work hard to fight this Paul and I'm sure you will be well on your way to 'normality' (whatever that is !!!) again.

I don't think you are being a bitch about your ex girlfriend. You are moving on (hopefully) whic is always a good thing

Take care
lucky