Doing it By the Spoonful

[fduop]

As I've mentioned, I have had problems with anxiety and panic since 1999. During all this time it's come in waves, hitting and missing me over the years. What I wanted to mention was something Dr. Jellybean (no disrespect intended, it's just what I call him) said a few weeks ago.

I was going on about how my social anxiety was hitting me every time I left the house for extended periods. When he suggested about taking my adventures out in smaller doses. I let the words soak in my hard head, then I finally started putting them into practice. So far the results have been pretty good.

I guess my point here is to say, while I still struggle with putting some "normalcy" into my life. Doing things in small doses has worked for me, and maybe, it can work for you also. As an added note usually my wife is with me, so... take from that what you will.

[ChrisScotland]

This is true - staying within your comfort zone until you're ready to push on a bit further helps, you don't want to be jumping in at the deep end and make yourself feel worse through failing to control your anxiety.Small steps are the way to go, you know when to push yourself and when to take it easy.

It's nice to get advice and help, but never let anyone dictate how you should be going about your recovery, you know best.

[fduop]

Just as an update to pushing the boundaries, I got an email to apply for a position at a major phone carrier. I completed the application and frankly thought nothing more of it, thinking I'd never get an offer.

Well I was surprised when I got an email back from the business wanting to interview me. The point I want to bring up is this, I got very uncomfortable a few days before the interview. But I worked through it and had a good first interview and will have a second this Friday.

I guess what I'm saying is, sometimes a little nudge is all it takes to get you back to life. Even if nothing comes of this interview, at lest it gives me more security and confidence to try again.

[fduop]

Well I'm sitting here waiting for my next interview with the actual hiring manager. The only thing I can thing of is how I'm I going to move my truck while the interview is taking place and my landlord decides today is the day to mow grass, OGH!

Other than that my stress level is okay. It is funny (ironic) that I have become so sensitive to stress. That even small levels of stress now effect me. Maybe I just need to work on handling low levels of stress. But the $64,000 question is, how do you do that, any suggestions?

[applecore]

Just as an update to pushing the boundaries, I got an email to apply for a position at a major phone carrier. I completed the application and frankly thought nothing more of it, thinking I'd never get an offer.

Well I was surprised when I got an email back from the business wanting to interview me. The point I want to bring up is this, I got very uncomfortable a few days before the interview. But I worked through it and had a good first interview and will have a second this Friday.

I guess what I'm saying is, sometimes a little nudge is all it takes to get you back to life. Even if nothing comes of this interview, at lest it gives me more security and confidence to try again.

Such a great way of looking at it! Despite everything you are going through, you have a lot of positivity, and that has to be good in terms of your recovery.

I have really severe social anxiety at the mo, but went for a short walk and into a shop WITHOUT self-service and where I had to speak to someone today, so feeling pretty pleased with myself! Small steps like you say.

[fduop]

applec

It did me some real good to know that small steps are helping you to. Over the past few days I've really had to fight the anxiety. But after 14/15 years of battling this, I feel some real victories in my life. But don't forgot your small victories either.

Whether I remember or not, I have fought and earned two college degrees while having panic disorder. Now I'm working (hard) on my Masters degree in technology management. So while I can say panic and anxiety have a hold, I can also say they haven't won either.

Maybe I'm too smart or just too damn stupid to give-up. Either way, maybe it's just that I'm tried of being tried that makes me keep fighting.

Best to you apple

[Davit]

This is part personal experience. The technical side is about exposure and I don't mean mooning people although that would be a distraction in some circumstances. Technically everything we do is based on past experience telling us how to do it. This is on the internet some where as the thought triangle. It is an eye opener for anyone who doesn't know it. It explains why off the deep end exposure doesn't work and slow and steady does. It is part of the CBT practice I used to get better.
Knowledge is power.

Davit

[mindful anxiety]

I thought about the movie "What about Bob" after reading your post.

Baby steps!

Baby steps to the curb, baby steps to the car.

So true!

[fduop]

Mindful, I went to You Tube and found the trailer to "What About Bob". I can't say I'm as frantic as Bob, but I will say I find myself acting like the Doctor from time to time.

---------- Post added at 13:02 ---------- Previous post was at 12:08 ----------

Good Afternoon. After a few days of some crazy May weather (lows in the 40's f and high's barely making the 70's f) I'm finally feeling better. One thing my doctor did Monday was change out my sinus med's. That wasn't a good idea, because the new stuff didn't work worth a flip. So I switched back to the old med and I'm feeling much better.

But enough about my sinus problems, this week I've been judging and critiquing as it were essays received by the University I attended for scholarships given out every year by the Alumni Association. This year I was asked to read essays and give a critique.

What this has done so far is remind of the reasons why I returned to school. After last year's near disaster which you may remember from previous posts. I was so happy to be leaving school with my MBA and my life, that I wasn't looking back. But reading these essys reminded me of my original reasons for going and finishing.

If I had to put a period on this note it would be, we each have dreams and we each have goals. They may be to complete your education or they may be to simple get out of the bed. Either one it's important to you. Without trying to end this by sounding too much like a lunch room poster. Often times we need to remind ourselves just why we want to get up in the morning. But just like I said before baby steps, one day at a time.

[koala]

My advice would be to go out and just see how far you get with a challenge. Don't pressurize yourself to stay until a certain time or point, just see how it goes and view everything you achieve (no matter how small) as a success. My biggest flaw is i am too hard on myself if i'm not able to achieve things i would like to have been able to do. Because i am too wrapped up in everything i haven't been able to do yet i forget about all the amazing things i have achieved and how much progress i have made in other areas. Hope this helps.