My anxiety gets really bad if my routine is disturbed.

[greg123]

Hi guys,

I just wanted to know if anyone else gets this or feels this way or has any advice for me.

Since having anxiety I have developed a 'routine' to my day, it's not a routine as in it's obsessive or as if I have to check the locks 50 times before I leave the house, but it feels 'safe' to me and I find if someone disrupts it, it will ruin my whole day due to the anxiety it causes.

For example my Brother will sometimes turn up randomly and ask me to go somewhere with him or ask me to help him out and it will cause anxiety. It even makes me angry, I know this sounds quite strange but I think how dare they turn up and cause me to feel this way, if they hand't have done that I would be fine and wouldn't be having a panic attack right now! It's rather stupid on my part as I'm the only one making myself feel this way.

I suppose I'm frustrated with myself as I'm not a spontaneous person anymore. I used to be, I used to go anywhere I wanted, I used to absolutely love to drive my car but now I can just about drive to the shop without having a panic attack.

It makes me feel really sad, I feel like my life is just passing me by and I'm missing out on so many things. I should be out with my friends and family enjoying the sunshine but instead I'm sat in my house feeling anxious

[Lyn89]

Yes, I get exactly the same thing. It's mild ocd, even if yours not checking things all the time, washing hands. However, I feel so much worse if I don't do something out of my routine than if I stick to it and avoid the different thing or event. Have you tried journalling? Write out your worries and try to respond to the worry with a more positive thought or write about a time you went through something similar and got through it okay. Also write down the good times for future reference. Like: today my brother came round and we went out here and here and I was anxious at first but I did it, etc. The more you do things and see that you're okay, the easier it will get in future. You can apply this to a lot more than just breaking routine too you're definitely not alone though, I get upset still if things change or its the weekend and I'm not working because I'm not as busy or used to different days. You just need to broaden the horizon of things you can do. It takes a while but it is very possible. Then lots of things will feel safe till you can do the things everyone else can

[Booboojenny]

Lyn89
Thank you for your really thoughtful helpful post

[aprilmoon]

Hi Greg,
Yes,I've had this too.
When my depression and anxiety were at their worst,I found comfort in doing the same things.
I even ate the same things each day!
It felt as though my world was unsteady around me,and this helped me to sort of put one foot in front of the other for a while.
As I began to recover,I started doing things a bit differently,until it seemed that some of those habits actually started to remind me more of that awful time,and I moved away from them,with a few exceptions.
As more positive experiences happen,you'll move away from the old habits,because they will have served their purpose
Take care

[AnxietyDJ]

I'm exactly the same...

For example the past week or so (since joining the site funnily enough - a mere coincidence?!) I have been keeping a fairly good daily schedule.... Sleeping not too bad (although never great - but thats another problem entirely!), eating at regular times, sitting down to work at regular times. etc etc. and I've been feeling pretty good - better than I have in a while at least, yet last night I went to see some friends, had some alcohol for the first time in three weeks, and then ended up going to bed very late, and now today i've been feeling really lousy - nothing i can exactly put my finger on, but just quite 'meh'

Back to normal routine tomorrow

[Sunflower2]

I also have quite a set routine which upsets me when plans change, I've always been like this but then I've always had ocd, so it's just my mind that likes routines! But to increase your recovery, I think it's important to try and live out with your routines as it will ask as exposure and show you that you can actually do something out with the norm. It's hard and feels odd at first, but with repetition you can create new routines incorporating more variety into your life. I'm never going to be a spontaneous person, but with time I can adapt to change as fine as the next person and I'm sure you can too!

[IHATEANXIETY]

Hi

My routine keeps me on the straight and narrow. I hate anything that disturbs it, even holidays and days out What's all that about????
Things other people enjoy and look forward to I just can't. There is something about me that just can't seem to allow myself to enjoy stuff it's like I'm not worthy of it.
I go over stuff days before all the different scenarios and work myself into a frenzy.
I just want to be normal x