I appreciated all your replies to my posting, and did get to see my dad who is now home and recovering. He and my mum were just pleased to see me and I got through the visit without breaking down, which was good for both of them.
Must admit though that since I came home I've been feeling physically wretched. I've been so tense and now my insides are kicking back at me - burning guts, sharp aches and pains in my ribs and the fibromyalgia is flaring up big time. Must be a delayed shock and come down after all the stress.
D.