hey,Soph, don't be too hard on yourself, you are quite clearly not dumb, crazy or pathetic ... just needed some love and understanding at a difficult time, and I don't like labels either, as I am stuck with the "can't sing for toffee but insists on getting up on the karaoke" label! Make a docs appointment, as I am sure a bit of councelling could do you the world of good. You friends are probably a lot less judgemental than you would think as well, but I know that is probably hard to appreciate whilst you are feeling like this. Say to yourself, what would I do if this was my friend, you'd probably want to know and help wouldn't you? And that's probably what yours will be like for you. take care little one xx