Thanks Kirsty and April!

Yeah i know what you mean Kirsty, im often hard on myself too in addition to spending way too much time thinking things like : "how did this happen?" "Where did i go wrong?" Etc..
Neither is very helpfull and yes weak we are not, to qoute two klingon warriors on my favourite star trek show talking about a man dealing with claustrophobia:

"There is no greater enemy than one's own fears."
"It takes a brave man to face them."


I too havent gone very far yet and frustratingly driving has become harder too but with the help of the cbt4panic workbooks im trying to see things in a different light, i went out to walk the dog tonight and all the symptoms were out in force: jellylegs, dizzyness and disorientation and at first i had my usual response of "must turn back or collapse on the street" but i just basically repeated to myself "its only adrenaline it cant actually harm you" and the effect was surprising. The symptoms didnt go away at all but my fear of immenent disaster went down a lot. What also is a bit scary is that when i came home i was pretty hyper for a long while but i think this is normal. Still have lots of work to do with the books and this new way of dealing with things is very hard but im pretty sure this is a step in the right direction!