Trying to keep this short,
I started having anxiety attacks about 2 years ago. My job heavily involved public speaking on a basis and one day for whatever reason I lost my breath while talking and then it became a self fulfilling prophecy that it would keep happening and it did. I quit that job 2 months later, despite previously being happy and loved it.
Have tried breathing exercises, am on the list for CBT and started propranolol 2 weeks ago. I can't handle stress at all and any little thing sets my anxiety off now. I am moody and twitchy and a shadow of myself, I used to be so joyful.
The beta blockers have worked okay, fewer heart palps but that's about it.
Tonight I was taking a flight, one of my most stressful situations, with my elderly parents who are another trigger for me. They bicker, are demanding and stressful to me.
I cope mainly with my anxiety by being able to get some breathing space alone, being with others doesn't help, so finally after a near attack twice at the airport and me being very hot and about an 8
On the panic scale, I got them
Settled in their disabled seats and went to sit in my own seat alone and started to breathe. Then a cousin of mine jumped out shouting suprise, she was coming to as a surprise for me. The idea of having to make 2 hours of conversation when I needed my space to calm down was too much and I had the worst attack I've ever had in my life, my propranolol tonight may aswell have been pixie dust. I had a full blown panic attack, heart palps and dizzyness and pushed past everyone saying they had to let me off the plane, I needed to get off.
I am now at home and have missed my holiday, I have never felt so low in my life.
Reply With Quote
