Finding it difficult on my own

[Mdeasha]

Recently I've been through a large lymphoma scare. Have been to see a haematologist, who was not worried at all. Told me that if she could have a node biopsied she would. But they are too small for that. Which she said was comforting in itself. I think I'm down from 90% thinking I have lymphoma to about 20%.

I started private CBT during this time, as I could not bare the waiting list. I've had 4 sessions which helped me a lot. But now I've gone back to uni and I'm finding it very hard without the weekly sessions. I know people say you shouldn't become reliant on CBT, but it's so hard not to be. I can feel the despair and depression coming back some days and it scares me. I don't want to go back to the way it was.

Being on my own is horrible, feel so isolated and it probably doesn't help as it gives me more time to convince myself there's something wrong. As with most of my posts I don't know what I'm expecting in the way of replies. I just needed an outlet I guess.

Thanks for reading

---------- Post added at 13:06 ---------- Previous post was at 13:04 ----------

Oh and when I say it was a large scare, nobody else thought that, including all the medical experts, just me.

[Fishmanpa]

Recently I've been through a large lymphoma scare. Have been to see a haematologist, who was not worried at all. Told me that if she could have a node biopsied she would. But they are too small for that. Which she said was comforting in itself. I think I'm down from 90% thinking I have lymphoma to about 20%.

I started private CBT during this time, as I could not bare the waiting list. I've had 4 sessions which helped me a lot. But now I've gone back to uni and I'm finding it very hard without the weekly sessions. I know people say you shouldn't become reliant on CBT, but it's so hard not to be. I can feel the despair and depression coming back some days and it scares me. I don't want to go back to the way it was.

Being on my own is horrible, feel so isolated and it probably doesn't help as it gives me more time to convince myself there's something wrong. As with most of my posts I don't know what I'm expecting in the way of replies. I just needed an outlet I guess.

Thanks for reading

---------- Post added at 13:06 ---------- Previous post was at 13:04 ----------

Oh and when I say it was a large scare, nobody else thought that, including all the medical experts, just me.

Who says it's bad to rely on CBT? It's a way of thinking not unlike working out for your mind. That would be like saying going to the gym to stay fit is bad for you. If you stop "working out", whether it's your body or your mind, you become weak. The exercises and techniques in CBT are useful for everyday life situations too. There's a free course here on the site. Why not download it and use it?

Positive thoughts

[Mdeasha]

Who says it's bad to rely on CBT

I just feel like I'm TOO reliant on it. It really works for me, and without it I'm struggling, luckily I can text my therapist if I need to talk. It's just hit me hard not having the weekly session. I didn't know that about the download, thank you!