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Thread: Am I being stubborn or are they pushing me too far?

  1. #1

    Question Am I being stubborn or are they pushing me too far?

    I have been battling GAD & Agoraphobia for years and I cannot walk past the end of our road alone (just a few buildings each way) and haven't been able to for years, as soon as I lose sight of my house major panic kicks in. I can however on a good day and if i really, really force myself walk a little further if someone I feel safe with accompanies me.

    Three weeks ago I started seeing a therapist the appointments are a 10/15min walk or a short car ride away so I can only get to them if I take someone with me. After my last session and after only chats that have nothing to do with leaving my home or ways to deal with the panic my therapist turned around and said he wants me to walk to my appointments alone from now on I just cannot do that, even the thought of this terrifies me. I understand that I need to expose myself to the world outside my home without any safety measures but a 10/15 minute walk when I can only walk a couple of houses down the road alone now is just too far. How on earth am I supposed to do this?

    They also suggested I apply for a job to get me out of the house. I really don't think I can do that right now either. I had to leave my last job because I simply could not cope and the longer I stayed there the worse I got plus my bosses were very unsympathetic about my situation.

    Am I being stubborn when I tell him that it's too much for me right now?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Posts
    27,320

    Re: Am I being stubborn or are they pushing me too far?

    I would suggest you discuss this further with your therapist and explain to them that these suggestions are too much right now. They can then reduce the intensity of an exercise to a more manageable level.

    There are 2 forms of exposure therapies, the original Exposure Therapy which used 'flooding' which is exposure to the worst triggers and Exposure Response Prevention (ERP) Therapy which uses a hierarchy where you start at a lower intensity and gradually build up. The latter is often the norm thesedays because it provides sets of goals that you can work through.

    I don't think you are being stubborn. I can see how the walk may be a possibility, although maybe it needs to be broken down further so you build up to the 10/15 mins. Applying for a job is a bit too much in my opinion as it means a large goal and anxiety is all about micro goals (small steps).

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Posts
    299

    Re: Am I being stubborn or are they pushing me too far?

    Explain to him it's too much in one go. Maybe smaller steps, like getting someone to walk you part of the way and then do the last bit yourself.

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