Alcohol/sedative-hypnotic addiction, does anyone understand?

[Shapeshifting Lizard]

I’ve been drinking constantly for a while. I’ve been getting massive disturbances and fear of closing my eyes and lying down in the dark, as if I’ve reverted back to early childhood. I think other people who have been down the same route know what I’m on about. Random images, flashing 3 times a second you can’t control, they only stop when you open your eyes. It’s got to the point where if I want to get an ordinary sleep I have to get almost totally drunk, otherwise I will just sleep for an hour and wake up again.

I have been prescribed nitrazepam from my doctor, and although it used to work I’m building up a tolerance that’s too high. I tried to get to sleep at midday (day and night mean nothing to me anymore) and before I went to bed I took 20mg nitrazepam within 3 hours. It relaxed me, but all that happened was I would fall asleep for 20 mins, wake up, fall asleep again, wake up, etc. etc.

I am scared because I feel as if I try deliberately to cut my drinking down I will not fall asleep until I physically collapse from exhaustion. I have been falling asleep on buses only to knock my head against the next chair, but take me to a silent room and I'll be wide awake. I am on an alcohol support course but it’s only just started. It’s also hard cause my parents (allegedly) are getting divorced and I am also moving out soon. This might just be a vent, but if anyone wants to reply cause they know what I’m on about that’s cool.

[Serenity1990]

I cannot relate to the alcohol problems (I'll have a single pint probably most nights, but I don't think this is the level to which you refer), however I have experienced the sleep issues in the past. The thing I'd recommend is Sainsbury's Herbal Sleep Aid. It's entirely natural and works far better than any of the prescription or non-prescription things I've come across.

Perhaps if you drink to sleep this might help in giving it up. But I'm afraid you do need to give it up if you've become dependent, and the sooner you seek help to do so the better.

[Shapeshifting Lizard]

I cannot relate to the alcohol problems (I'll have a single pint probably most nights, but I don't think this is the level to which you refer), however I have experienced the sleep issues in the past. The thing I'd recommend is Sainsbury's Herbal Sleep Aid. It's entirely natural and works far better than any of the prescription or non-prescription things I've come across.

Perhaps if you drink to sleep this might help in giving it up. But I'm afraid you do need to give it up if you've become dependent, and the sooner you seek help to do so the better.

I am completely dependant. My doctor says I won't have proper withdrawl but I will have panic attacks. I'll have a look out for that, if it works for you I'll give it a go. I know why I'm not sleeping, it's disturbing memories but I've chosen not to talk to people about them. Yeah, I know that's not good but there's too much going on, just wanna get some sleep and cut the booze down.

[Shapeshifting Lizard]

I've been honest with my doctor, saying that I tried 4 nitrazapem in a row and it didn't even get me to sleep. So he's took me off them, and I suppose I trust him. I'm gonna see how everything goes. I'm still drinking all the time, I think I'll have to go for a month or so with very little sleep. It's ok I suppose as long as my family understand, which they flipping don't but anyway, I'll give it my best shot. I know that after I stop drinking every day there'll be a long period of me getting back used to enjoying myself as normal. I'm scared of that.

[Fishmanpa]

I can relate on the addiction aspect as I was on opiates for pain for over 9 months due to cancer and treatment. I had to wean myself off as it was akin to heroin withdraw. It wasn't pleasant that's for sure.

That being said, I'm glad you're under a doctor's care. Is he aware of your alcohol consumption? I ask because the combination of drugs and alcohol, especially in the amounts you speak of is dangerous. I would question prescribing the benzos knowing you're drinking as you say you are.

Sending positive thoughts and prayers that you find the fortitude to break the detrimental cycle and habits you're currently in.

[Shapeshifting Lizard]

I can relate on the addiction aspect as I was on opiates for pain for over 9 months due to cancer and treatment. I had to wean myself off as it was akin to heroin withdraw. It wasn't pleasant that's for sure.

That being said, I'm glad you're under a doctor's care. Is he aware of your alcohol consumption? I ask because the combination of drugs and alcohol, especially in the amounts you speak of is dangerous. I would question prescribing the benzos knowing you're drinking as you say you are.

Sending positive thoughts and prayers that you find the fortitude to break the detrimental cycle and habits you're currently in.

Thanks man . He's taken me off nitrazepam but he says he does want to prescribe me librium in the future. But I said, I don't want to stop drinking until I've moved house and settled in. I'm moving in about 3 weeks. I'm a little scared about leaving the nitrazepam, because it does help me somewhat. And, I am scared about living on my own cause I've never done it for more than 3 weeks. I will be having support, but there's at least a 2 and a half hour distance between any of my relatives and quite a cost.

He knows exactly how much I'm drinking. It's about 60cl vodka a day, which is close to a "fifth".

The withdrawl for me is strange. I've never gone into full withdrawal at all, but I've got the precursors. I start having incredibly realistic dreams, and when I can't sleep I get flashing pictures which go through my mind at like 3 times a second. Just BANG BANG BANG BANG. It makes it impossible to sleep. I do get shakes, but my doctor says that's more "panic" than it is actual delirious withdrawal.

I also get mad, schizotypal thoughts sometimes. But I think that's more "I'm already drunk" than "I'm braindamaged". I'm still in the land of the living.

[PaulieC]

I understand exactly what you're talking about. I am currently dry after a massive drinking binge. Halfway through the drinking, I would start getting random sentences popping into my head and any time I closed my eyes, I would see horrific, incredibly realistic images on a constant loop. Let me promise you one thing. Once you get dry, this will go away. It takes a long time and it's very disturbing. But if you undergo a supervised withdrawal, you will get better. I've not been dry that long, just coing up a fortnight, and my anxiety levels are through the roof. My sleep is very little, but I'm honest to God thankful when it does come. I too panic about collapsing from exhaustion and this is primarily what brought me here. I get too little sleep, feel tired as all hell and then go around and around in an anxiety cycle. You will get better, but it's going to be awful in places. Don't let that deter you from making some great changes. Good luck.

[Shapeshifting Lizard]

I understand exactly what you're talking about. I am currently dry after a massive drinking binge. Halfway through the drinking, I would start getting random sentences popping into my head and any time I closed my eyes, I would see horrific, incredibly realistic images on a constant loop. Let me promise you one thing. Once you get dry, this will go away. It takes a long time and it's very disturbing. But if you undergo a supervised withdrawal, you will get better. I've not been dry that long, just coing up a fortnight, and my anxiety levels are through the roof. My sleep is very little, but I'm honest to God thankful when it does come. I too panic about collapsing from exhaustion and this is primarily what brought me here. I get too little sleep, feel tired as all hell and then go around and around in an anxiety cycle. You will get better, but it's going to be awful in places. Don't let that deter you from making some great changes. Good luck.

Cheers. If that's what you're saying's real it must be going on with me. It's almost exactly the same. I can't believe my dad put up with this for so many years. It's just a bummer that I'm moving in a week. It's like everything closes down on you at the same time all at once.

[hanshan]

Hi Lizard,

You really sound like you need supervised withdrawal in an in-patient setting, with at least a few days follow-up.

How are you managing to pay for the vodka? It's almost a bottle a day, which I imagine is fairly expensive in the UK.