Anxiety attacks, can you advise me please?
I hope this is the right forum.
Where do I start? I'm not sure.
Once a year I go to Newquay in Cornwall for a break from the stresses of the city, I love it here and would love to retire here one day.
Anyway I keep seeing a man who works in an arcade, I think he's the manager or so he's said. I am always polite to people and I like to chat. This year he gave me his mobile phone number and asked me if I would like to meet him at Perrenporth beach which he said he sometimes goes on walks on. I politely accepted it because I didn't want to be rude. I have Ashburgers so if you know what that condition is you know what it also entails etc but that's another story.
Anyway I began to worry a bit because I always listen to my gut feeling and I wasn't sure about meeting him. The next day i thought i better text him in case he thought i was being rude. I did and he texed back saying 'who's this, text back'. I* did and he asked me if I wanted to meet him on the Sunday asking me if I wanted to visit him. I said no because I had something on (which i did) and he never texed back which made me a bit worried I had put my foot in it etc.
I went to visit him the next day at the arcade but he wasn't there as it was his day off. I did manage to chat to him and he said I hadn't upset him, but I have been in a violent relationship in the past and you learn to read men etc.
Then he said 'don't go telling the others I gave you my phone number' I thought I had put my foot in it but he said I hadn't. After that I started to feel a bit odd and in a caf! my appetite completely vanished and I went all hot and cold. Since then I occasionally get (I don't know whether to call them panic attacks or hypos) which wasn't very nice because I thought I was going down with a virus etc.
I was with my parents and my mum is deaf and I couldn't get her to understand why I was so anxious. She misunderstood (which is a problem people with Ashburgers get) because they can't get across what we mean which is bloody frustrating.
My dad is going deaf through age and he insists on going to that arcade which I avoid like the plague now, and keeps telling me to ignore him; if it was only as easy as that. He doesn't really have the patience for my condition and I know have to talk to my parents in a loud voice otherwise they'd never hear me.
Now I keep going shaky and anxious for no reason now, it's not as bad as it was but I take rescue remedy which seems to help but it's very expensive at £8 for a tiny bottle of drops in Superdrug!
I saw one Dr who didn't bother to listen to a word I said, asked me a question and abruptly before I had time to answer said I had to go and I'd have to make another appointment to answer it! I don't think so and that angered me to no end:
What's the bloody point of asking me a question then basically telling me to !!!!!! off because my time was up!
I have seen another Dr who wants me to go on pills! I don't want this, why are these things dished out like sweets? PILLS for every damn thing! I have agreed to a blood test, but I doubt they will find anything (apart from my blood group which is A)
So I have come on here asking for advice, I know it's a bit long winded, so sorry about that.
I don't have anyone apart from my parents, last night I awoke feeling anxious, probably because I have needle phobia and I was worrying about the injection.
Many thanks for reading.
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