Enlightenment on a negative thought process impeding recovery

[spicyunicornmeat]

*Posted on the Agroaphobia board too.

Hi Everyone,

I have had agoraphobia for 10 years on and off. It fired up again back in November. I am 8 months pregnant with 2 kids under 4, so I am sure hormones and stress have something to do with it.

I understand anxiety, I understand panic, I understand the physiology, I know it won't hurt me, it is harmless, etc.

However I have one BIG hurdle that I cannot seem to get over - I am afraid of having a panic attack away from home. Period. End of story. The farther I am away from home, the scarier it is. I envision myself in X place, X distance away. I imagine a panic attack happening and because this really scares me I lack the confidence in feeling as though I can manage the fear and feelings. I worry I will succumb to it and have to suffer through the deep regret and feeling of being trapped etc until I get home. Rapid heart rate, shakes, etc. that stuff doesn't bother me. What does is thinking about possibly panicking all the way home :/ There are 2 things that are true: 1) I can't get home until X time passes and 2) I am afraid of feeling those feelings being away. Due to this I cannot move forward.

I am totally cool with feeling them at home, I am not afraid of anxiety and panic at home. It has no hold on my life, it is boring and unimportant. It can come anytime here and I am good. Zero fear. I just cannot apply this to the outside world. I think it is because the attacks are so intense when I am out because I am trapped. When I am out and have an attack it is like a level 8 out of 10 - I want to run, I want to flee, I want to get to the ER, I want to hide in the bathroom, I feel as though I have made the worst, most horrendous mistake.

If I can just get over this notion of home as my safety zone I could be free!

Changing your thoughts when it comes to anxiety changes your life...all it takes is looking at something differently and things get better. However, I cannot wrap my head around this one. I need enlightenment.........

Thank you!

[urbanhermit]

*Posted on the Agroaphobia board too.

Hi Everyone,

I have had agoraphobia for 10 years on and off. It fired up again back in November. I am 8 months pregnant with 2 kids under 4, so I am sure hormones and stress have something to do with it.

I understand anxiety, I understand panic, I understand the physiology, I know it won't hurt me, it is harmless, etc.

However I have one BIG hurdle that I cannot seem to get over - I am afraid of having a panic attack away from home. Period. End of story. The farther I am away from home, the scarier it is. I envision myself in X place, X distance away. I imagine a panic attack happening and because this really scares me I lack the confidence in feeling as though I can manage the fear and feelings. I worry I will succumb to it and have to suffer through the deep regret and feeling of being trapped etc until I get home. Rapid heart rate, shakes, etc. that stuff doesn't bother me. What does is thinking about possibly panicking all the way home :/ There are 2 things that are true: 1) I can't get home until X time passes and 2) I am afraid of feeling those feelings being away. Due to this I cannot move forward.

I am totally cool with feeling them at home, I am not afraid of anxiety and panic at home. It has no hold on my life, it is boring and unimportant. It can come anytime here and I am good. Zero fear. I just cannot apply this to the outside world. I think it is because the attacks are so intense when I am out because I am trapped. When I am out and have an attack it is like a level 8 out of 10 - I want to run, I want to flee, I want to get to the ER, I want to hide in the bathroom, I feel as though I have made the worst, most horrendous mistake.

If I can just get over this notion of home as my safety zone I could be free!

Changing your thoughts when it comes to anxiety changes your life...all it takes is looking at something differently and things get better. However, I cannot wrap my head around this one. I need enlightenment.........

Thank you!

Hello

As you know, stress can be a major factor in issues with anxiety. Couple that with your pregnancy, and it's quite natural to be feeling the way you do.

As you say, the anxiety cannot harm you; sure, it feels a little uncomfortable but it's actually no different to the symptoms you've overcome in the past.

As a former semi-professional agoraphobic , I used to get my self into a state about having attacks away from my home.

What I found useful, was to visualise leaving the house and enjoying my trip out and having fun. I can tell you, it's not easy at first, but if you do some deep breathing to calm yourself down and just rehearse leaving the house, going to the shops etc in a relaxed state, it's really helpful when you do go out for real.

I also found it useful to tell whoever I was with, that I might have an anxiety attack and people will support you.

In terms of getting over the home being your safety zone, I found a lot of benefit in thinking of mind, not my home, as the safety zone - again, I used to rehearse this whilst relaxed and found it to be really helpful.

A good example, was that last summer, I was able to go on holiday (4 hours away) and didn't have a single panic attack nor, did I use rescue remedy etc as I just didn't have any symptoms.

Finally, congratulations on the upcoming birth.

Take care,

UrbanHermit