Hi...
I used these forums 4-5 years ago for help when I was going through a tough period of health-related GAD. Everyone was absolutely wonderful, and I now find myself in what currently feels like a more difficult position and just kind of... gravitated back.
Last February, my partner and I moved 800 miles from home. We now live on an island in the middle of the North Sea and I know very few people, and am currently unemployed. My head has become a mess. I mean, my head has always been a mess. From the age of 4, I have struggled with Anxiety, low self-esteem, and what would eventually develop into OCD. I am terrified of people, I can't think of a good word to say about myself, and I feel utterly useless not being able to find anything to do with my life.
My GAD has had various spells, most often health-related (either my own health problems, or those of someone I care about), but now I find myself facing a different, and as I see it, more ugly problem. I am terrified that my partner is unhappy in our relationship, paranoid that he is going to find/has already found someone else, and am completely doing both of our heads in. He is a wonderful man. Honest, kind, and gentle. He has moved to a little island with me, miles from everyone he has ever known, and is working a job that makes him miserable. I know all this, but I can't allow common sense to tell me that the problems are with outside factors, not inside ones.
I guess... I don't know. This is a rubbish introduction. I'm Sophie. I'm 24. I have struggled with Anxiety for 20 years, but I have never felt as tired of it, and as determined to get rid of it as I do now. I guess, really, I just came back in the hope that I could find some advice. I am tired and lost and afraid, and I want to be able to live the life we moved to get. Hi?
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