I dont know what to do anymore with my life,Im male 22 have anxiety and adhd,no skills,no job,never go outside anymore except for do important things,I day dreaming a lot,I talk to my self a lot,but I cant talk to people,I cant see stranger straight in the face,I even day dreaming while riding my motorcycles,but somehow I never have accident and still can focus on road while daydreaming,I never went to colleges,I only finish my highschool,I never been abused,I never been bullied,in my whole life I only have few friends,but each one of them start to leave one by one,they never contacted me anymore,I dont blame them,I realize I have bad communication skills,and dead boring,I cant afford to see a doctor I live in 3rd world country somewhere in far east,I think about suicide,but im not suicidal tho, no way In my country I could get guns,too scare to hang my self or overdose by pills(im scare if I survive my family will also take the shame)what could be worse than this?I cant even kill my self,I get nervous everytime I meet people,I become panic,I become delusional,I always think all of them is uderestimating me,look down on me,I just know they weren't ,but I cant help it,I also cant focus at anything,and get boring fast over anything,and also Im emotionally unstable,I really appreciate help, I want to be help,I need help,I want to change,I want a normal life.
My english is bad sorry