Recent Events

[pulisa]

This is truth. It's truly not to diminish the connections, friendships or real caring nature of those behind the usernames and thumbnails but it's true. On some forums and boards, depending on the subject matter, real life meet ups and gatherings take it beyond the realm of the digital world and make it more "real". Again, it's not to diminish anything, it's just fact. The fact is, one click of the little "x" on the browser window and it all goes away.

I was well aware of the drama taking place. I received several PMs asking for opinions and to help/intervene but felt it best to refrain from doing so. It was a wise thing to do as it didn't concern me, but then I've always been that way concerning forums. I've learned the hard way that sometimes, who people are in real life is far different than the persona they portray in the cyber world. Anyone that has used on-line dating can attest to that Again, not to say there are some gems out there (I met my wife on an on-line dating forum) but the line about kissing a lot of frogs applies. I could tell you some war stories!

It's sad that the situation took place but the truth is there will be those that come and go and NMP will continue to go on as long as the owners of the domain keep it going.

Positive thoughts

Of course it will and this site means different things to different people. We can make the website disappear by just logging off whereas "real life" problems cannot be eliminated by the "click of a switch", obviously.

We don't know what will go on to happen in "real life" with those affected and we aren't responsible for them or for how they choose to behave but even so this hasn't been pleasant. I'm sorry to hear of previous distressing personal attacks-there are some very disturbed people out there and moderating any mental health website must be an onerous task and one not to be taken lightly.

I'm not surprised that people asked for your opinions, FMP. You have been through one hell of a lot yet continue to help people by offering sensible and heartfelt advice which is straight to the point and really hits home. You are the Voice of Reason around here!

[ricardo]

Wow yesterday was a day to forget and I supposed although I felt I was the main person being targeted I lost my cool and said a few things I shouldn't have, and again without going over everything again, my frustration got the better of me.

You have to remember that I have just recently had a heart attack which has had a direct baring on my mood and anxiety, and stress levels were easily sent through the roof.

Thanks to all the admin at NMP for letting me reverse my decision so quickly,and support from many members, but I thought it would be better to say all this now rather than let it linger on, despite still hurting, I already feel better.

I have duplicated this comment on my original thread but wanted as many as possible to see it. Thanks.

__________________

[pulisa]

I'm very pleased to see you back, Ricardo! I'm so glad you're feeling better too.

[dally]

To be honest this "drama" is nothing compared to some of the stuff the admins have been through in the past.

We have had the police involved in a few incidents and me and Emmz were sent hate mail and objects in the post to our home addresses!

I really don't see that this compares to that.
I'm so shocked by this!! Why would anyone send you hate mail? And to your home address? Sickening!

[Pipkin]

And what Nic and Emma aren't telling you is that it got worse than that. I won't divulge the details but suffice it to say, some of the things they received in the post and some messages to their home addresses would be enough to rattle even the bravest member. They both dealt with it very well and they're still here which is more than a lot of people would have been.

Trust me, as admins we're all here to help you and we have your best interests at heart but it's far from easy at times and we deal with things the best way we can. And very importantly, we may not always be able to tell you some things that go on behind the scenes for reasons of confidentiality and some of the actions we take, but we will always tell you the truth. You never need to question that.

This isn't us fishing for compliments although many of you have posted lovely messages of support and they are much appreciated. It's mainly to tell you that we are here, watching the forums and will always do what we can to make this a supportive, welcoming and inclusive forum which is why we have to be absolutely certain before we take formal action against any member. If we took punitive action against all members who are suffering severely from anxiety and post inappropriate comments now and again, there are many active members here today who would have wrongly been excluded from the site.

I hope you all have a lovely evening

Pip

[Elen]

If we took punitive action against all members who are suffering severely from anxiety and post inappropriate comments now and again, there are many active members here today who would have wrongly been excluded from the site.
Pip

Couldn't agree more Pip.

[Annie0904]

I haven't been on the site much recently so have just really caught up with all this and pleased to see there is peace in the camp again I hate to see any upsets.

Good to have you back with us Ricardo Sorry to hear about your heart attack, my husband has had 2 and it is tough to deal with :(

To all admin, I have seen some of the things you have had to cope with in this past and I just want to say that I for one really appreciate all the time that you put into running the site especially as you all have your own battles and struggles to deal with.

Time for some group hugs I think

[venusbluejeans]

I'm so shocked by this!! Why would anyone send you hate mail? And to your home address? Sickening!

Loooong story that one..... not a nice one but suffice to say an ex member(s) with a grudge

Thank you all for your kind words Annie xx

[blue moon]

Lovely to see you came back Ronny.

[MyNameIsTerry]

I'm not on Facebook as it doesn't appeal to me either.

I'm sorry to hear that other members have drifted away but I'm not surprised. There is always going to be the potential for this type of situation given the nature of our issues and we are just a bunch of usernames communicating in the cyberworld. We don't know each other. We can only guess and use gut instinct.

Is it OK to reflect on things in a sensitive way? Just as a way to "move forward" and try to prevent this from happening again?

Its just forums, its only escalation that can be prevented. People will always fall out until the day that the robots take over.

I don't know otherwise. People will move on in various ways, without discussion & reconciliation, that's all it can be. Since that's unlikely for all in a forum setting, as opposed to a controlled group one, it's individual to each person but it can be a thinking time.