Scared that I could be attracted to my brother!!

[char123]

Hi

I know it sounds like I am a complete freak but I fear that I am attracted to my own brother. I don't think and I seriously hope I do not but for some reason it makes me anxious so I sort of believe that I am. It's so messed up. Obviously I wouldn't like to be so I'm hoping this is anxiety related! I've heard that it could be because of OCD but I haven't been diagnosed with it so is it true?
It's like my mind has convinced myself that I am so if I even look at him it makes me nervous and anxious because I'm scared that I'll have feelings for him or something. I know it's so messed up and I feel completely alone because I haven't heard of anyone without ocd fearing this. I'm too disgusted in this thought to discuss it with my counsellor. I've had this fear before and it usually passes when I rationally think that it is not true because it is crazy. I mean he really annoys me and is rude to me quite abit so I don't see why I would like him in that way. Is this because of anxiety?? I have had a similar type of fear in the way that I am scared that I am a lesbian but I haven't mentioned that to the counsellor either.

Please reply nicely because I freak out easily!! I'm 16 year old female and I really don't want to feel anxious whenever I see my brother or something now. I am pretty sure I'm not attracted to him but with anxiety ivfind that I overanalyse and question everything. I just want it to stop!! Please help

Thanks for reading

[Oosh]

It's just something you've suggested to yourself. Then add a load of self doubt and these suggestions can really freek you out. I've had them about all sorts of ridiculous stuff but the "what if" will have you doubting yourself and wondering if it's true.

Recognise the suggestions.
Recognise the doubt.
I find it easier to let them go if I do this.

"I find him annoying" haha. Do that ! Fight back, that's what I try and do. Suggest your own stuff to counter it's ridiculous, mischievous suggestion.

Don't give the suggestions any meaning.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Hi,

I really do think you should talk to your counsellor about this.

Did you know that fearing you could be gay/bisexual or even a gay person fearing they could be hetrosexual is a known form of OCD? Having intrusive sexual thoughts about family members is also a known form of OCD? If you looked at the OCD forms you would see things like this clearly explained but NMP doesn't have many of us with OCD so it's very limited in the information it provides. Charities such as OCD Action and OCD UK have a lot of articles that explain things like this and then there are medical professional websites like Steve Seay's who has some excellent articles on the Pure O forms like these.

So, it could be that part of your anxiety includes some intrusive thoughts hence it's not clinically significant enough to warrant a separate diagnosis or you have a comorbid condition in that you have OCD too.

Your counsellor can help you with this and you shouldn't feel afraid to discuss it, although this is very common with sexual themes in OCD, because they are trained to work with it and understand the forms of OCD where this occurs.

You aren't attracted to your brother because you are reacting with anxiety which is a classic sign of the OCD cycle with intrusive thoughts. There are others going through this on the OCD board and I will try and find one I know of and add a link so you can see what has been discussed which will include solutions for recovering from this.

Whilst you may feel guilty or ashamed, it's best to try to avoid this because it reinforces it as does any emotional reaction, the stronger the better as far as your subconscious is concerned as it sees it as confirmation it did something "valid". Notice I said "valid" and not "correct"? Don't try to analyse it, interact with it or even push it away as those are all reinforcers too. Try to be non judgemental about it and see it as no more important than the thought of needing a bottle of milk popping into your mind when you are walking around the supermarket. I know this is hard though because I've been through it too with harm based thoughts which I have stopped.

EDIT: This is one person around your age, male, who has the same issue about his sister:

http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=170203

[Ryukil]

Classic OCD. I was worried about being attracted to relatives too. It's nothing. OCD just makes you worry that the worst thing possible could be true