Re: I don't know if I'm depressed or not; I just feel like there's no hope?
I've just revisited this thread. It makes me feel better reading all of the kind replies
I've been on Accutane (rather, a variation of it) for almost two months. It has helped a LOT *knock on wood*. The active stuff is almost all gone.
Now, scarring. Part of my problem is I've used such harsh stuff for so long, it's kind of stripped my skin. So I've gone for simple, gentle products for now.
I went several months without looking in mirrors, and now it's like I'm obsessed with forcing myself to look at my reflection. The result totally depends on the lighting - sometimes it looks fine, others it looks terrible. I think most of it can be helped, generally, so I guess one step at a time. It's kind of a roller coaster though - after one like I feel really confident, after another my confidence is destroyed.
Still nervous about my future and just about everything. Guess that's anxiety. I do wish I had more confidence, but I just tell myself this experience is making me stronger in a different way. I've found I'm less judgmental of other people, but on the flip side I also tend to fixate on others' skin, wondering how mine looks in comparison.
And I do still feel like people are looking at me all the time. But I guess that could get easier in time too.
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On the road of experience, join in the living day. If there's an answer it's just that it's just that way.
When you're looking for space and to find out who you are...When you're looking to try and reach the stars.
It's a sweet, sweet, sweet dream; sometimes I'm almost there
Sometimes I fly like an eagle, sometimes I'm deep in despair.