Hey everyone.

After a rollercoaster of a year things finally came to a head today, breaking me down to tears and realising I needed to find somewhere to go and meet people who could understand what's been plaguing me.

So in short (Short as I can!) I've been living with Agoraphobia since my early teens, affecting my school and ultimately causing me to drop out at a tender age of 15. From there on out I was housebound, being given care that only really made the situation worse. My life trundled with ups and downs, including an abusive relationship and weight gain, up until last year.

I'm not entirely sure what switched, but I suddenly dropped 9 stone, met my current partner online and even ventured outside - not only for the first time in 13 years - but to stores, the airport and more. It was a pretty drastic and shocking change! I still get that anxiety and the fear of the unknown OUT THERE keeps me terrified, all made a little easier with something as simple as love.

So now, my current predicament as I go forward:

Being as I dropped out of school I have NO qualifications and NO work experience. This phobia essentially left me a ghost in the system and, all of a sudden, I need to head back out there and support myself somehow. I'd like to find a place with my girlfriend, work and drive (I'm learning to) but I have no idea how I can... Or even if I ever can. All of the anxiety of trying to dip my toes in the water and enter a normal working life terrifies me to the point of wanting to simply go back to how I was for those 13 years. Unhappy, but safe and supported.

It's a terrible mindset considering my progress, and dragged me to tears. I have no idea what options and support I can get, or the sort of work I could look into. I have looked around and seen jobs I'd enjoy, though realistically my chances of getting them are incredibly slim without experience - and I'd never be able to move out of the rut I'm in and support myself through education.

Basically I've seen nothing of the world outside the eyes of a teenager and have no idea where I'm going.

Thank you for reading all that - if anyone has any words of advice or similar experience I'd love to hear it!